[King Robert Baratheon pays a visit to Lord Eddard Stark of Winterfell]
[Ned looks at him with a cocked eyebrow as if to say "Look who's talking", then they both burst out laughing and hug.]
Cat! [hugs and kisses Catelyn.]
Nine years! Why have I not seen you? Where the hell have you been?
Guarding the North for you, Your Grace. Winterfell is yours.
[Queen Cersei steps out of the carriage after her children with a distasteful look on her face.]
[to Robb] And who have we here? You must be Robb. [to Sansa] My, you're a pretty one. And your name is...
[to Bran] Ohhh, show us your muscles. You'll be a soldier!
[Robert chuckles and moves back towards Ned. Behind him, Jaime Lanniser removes his helmet]
That's Jaime Lannister, the Queen's twin brother.
Would you please shut up?!
[Cersei walks up to Ned and offers her hand; after a moment, Eddard kisses it.]
Take me to your crypt, I want to pay my respects.
Cersei LannisterWe've been riding for a month, my love. Surely, the dead can wait.
[Turns towards the crypts, followed hesitantly by Ned.]
[Cersei overhears her and goes back over to Jaime]
Cersei Lannister
Where is our brother? Go and find the little beast!
[Bran has just caught Queen Cersei having sex with her brother]
Cersei Lannister
He saw us!
It's all right, it's all right, it's all right.
Cersei Lannister
He saw us!
[to Cersei] I heard you the first time. [to Bran] Quite the little climber, aren't you? How old are you, boy?
Ten? [looks to Cersei again, who says nothing] The things I do for love.
[Jaime pushes Bran out the window]
MBMyrcella Baratheon
Is Bran going to die?
Cersei Lannister
What do you mean?
The Maester says the boy may live.
Cersei Lannister
It's no mercy, letting a child linger in such pain.
Only the Gods know for certain. All the rest of us can do is pray. The charms of the North seem entirely lost on you.
Cersei Lannister
I still can't believe you're going. It's ridiculous, even for you.
Where's your sense of wonder? The greatest structure ever built, the intrepid men of the Night's Watch, the wintry abode of the White Walkers!
Tell me you're not thinking of taking the Black.
And go celibate? The whores would go begging from Dorne to Casterly Rock! No, I just want to stand on top of the Wall and piss off the edge of the world!
Cersei Lannister
The children don't need to hear your filth. Come.
Even if the boy lives, he'll be a cripple. A grotesque. Give me a good, clean death any day.
Speaking for the grotesques, I'd have to disagree. Death is so final, whereas life, ahh, life is full of possibilities. I hope the boy does wake. I'd be interested to hear what he has to say.
My dear brother, at times you make me wonder whose side you're on.
My dear brother, you wound me. You know how much I love my family.
Cersei Lannister
How could you be so stupid?!
Cersei Lannister
He's a child! Ten years old! What were you thinking?
I was thinking of us. You're a bit late to start complaining about it now. What has the boy told them?
Cersei Lannister
Nothing. He said nothing, he remembers nothing.
Then what are you raving about?
Cersei Lannister
What if it comes back to him? If he tells his father what he saw—
We'll say he was lying. We'll say he was dreaming. We'll say whatever we like. I think we can outfox a ten-year-old.
Cersei Lannister
And my husband?
I'll go to war with him if I have to. They can write a ballad about us! "The War for Cersei's Cunt."
[Looking furious, Cersei slaps him. Jaime chuckles, then grabs her when she tries again]
Cersei Lannister
Let me go!
Cersei Lannister
[more afraid] Let me go...
The boy won't talk. And if he does, I'll kill him. Him, Ned Stark, the King, the whole bloody lot of them, until you and I are the only people left in this world.
Your pardon, Your Grace. I would rise, but...
Cersei Lannister
Do you know what your wife has done?
She did nothing I did not command.
Who'd have thought she had it in her?
Cersei Lannister
By what right dare you lay hands on my blood?
I am the King's Hand, I was keeping the peace.
Cersei Lannister
You were the King's Hand! You will be held accountable.
All right, will both of you shut your mouths? Catelyn will release Tyrion, and you'll make your peace with Jaime!
Cersei Lannister
Lord Stark was returning drunk from a brothel when his men attacked Jaime.
Jaime has fled the city. Give me leave to bring him back to justice.
Cersei Lannister
I took you for a King!
Cersei Lannister
He's attacked one of my brothers, and abducted the other! I should wear the armor, and you the gown!
[Robert turns and strikes her across the face.]
Cersei Lannister
I shall wear this bruise like a badge of honour.
Wear it in silence, or I'll honour you again.
[Cersei stares at Robert for a moment and leaves in disgust]
See what she does to me? My loving wife. [pours on some wine] I should not have hit her. [sits at the Bed's head] That was not... That was not kingly.
If we don't act, there will be a war.
So tell your wife to return that little shit of an Imp to King's Landing. She's had her fun, now put an end to it. (beat) You hear me? Send a raven and put an end to it!
And what about Jaime Lannister? What about Jaime?
I'm half a Kingdom in debt to his bloody father! I don't know what happened between you and those yellow haired shits, I don't want to know, this is what matters: I can't rule the Kingdoms if the Starks and the Lannisters are at each other's throats, so, enough!
As you command, Your Grace. With your leave, I will return to Winterfell and set matters straight.
Piss on that, send a raven, I want you to stay. I'm the King, I get what I want. (beat) I never loved my brothers. A sad thing for a man to admit, but it's true. You were the brother I chose.
I know the truth Jon Arryn died for.
Cersei Lannister
Do you, Lord Stark? Is that why you call me here, to pose me riddles?
[gesturing to the bruise on Cersei's cheek] Has he done this before?
Cersei Lannister
Jaime would have killed him. My brother is worth a thousand of your friend.
Your brother? Or your lover?
Cersei Lannister
The Targaryens wed brothers and sisters for three hundred years to keep bloodlines pure. Jaime and I are more than brother and sister. We shared a womb, came into this world together. We belong together.
Cersei Lannister
Do you love your children?
Cersei Lannister
No more than I love mine.
Cersei Lannister
Thank the gods. In the rare event Robert leaves his whores long enough to stumble drunken into my bed, I finish him off in other ways. In the morning, he doesn't remember.
Cersei Lannister
Hated him? I worshipped him! Every girl in the Seven Kingdoms dreamed of him, but he was mine by oath. And when I finally saw him on our wedding day in the Sept of Baelor, lean and fierce and black-bearded, it was the happiest moment of my life. And that night, he crawled on top of me, stinking of wine, and did what he did, what little he could do, and whispered in my ear, "Lyanna". Your sister was a corpse. I was a living girl, and he loved her more than me!
When the king returns from his hunt, I will tell him the truth. You must be gone by then, you and your children. I won't have their blood on my hands. Go as far away as you can with as many men as you can, because wherever you go, Robert's wrath will follow you.
Cersei Lannister
And what of my wrath, Lord Stark? You should have taken the realm for yourself. Jaime told me about the day King's Landing fell. He was sitting on the Iron Throne, and you made him give it up. All you needed to do was climb the steps yourself. Such a sad mistake.
I've made many mistakes in my life, but that wasn't one of them.
Cersei Lannister
Oh, but it was. When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die. There is no middle ground.
I command the council to make all necessary arrangements for my coronation. I wish to be crowned within the fortnight. Today I shall accept oaths of fealty from my loyal councilors.
Ser Barristan, I believe no man here could ever question your honour.
[Ser Barristan takes the scroll from Ned]
King Robert's seal. Unbroken. [breaks the seal and unrolls the scroll] "Lord Eddard Stark is herein named Protector of the Realm, to rule as Regent until the heir come of age".
Cersei Lannister
May I see that letter, Ser Barristan? "Protector of the Realm." [to Ned] Is this meant to be your shield, Lord Stark? A piece of paper? [rips the scroll to shreds]
Those were the King's words.
Cersei Lannister
We have a new King now. Lord Eddard, when we last spoke you offered me some counsel. Allow me to return the courtesy. Bend the knee, my Lord. Bend the knee and swear loyalty to my son and we shall allow you to live out your days in the gray waste you call home.
Your son has no claim to the throne.
Cersei Lannister
You condemn yourself with your own mouth, Lord Stark. Ser Barristan, seize this traitor.
Ser Barristan is a good man, a loyal man. Do him no harm.
Cersei Lannister
You think he stands alone?
[Gregor Clegane slowly approaches Ned while drawing his sword]
Kill him! Kill all of them, I command it!!
[to Janos] Commander! Take the Queen and her children into custody. Escort them back to the royal apartments and keep them there, under guard.
[The Gold Cloaks all draw their swords]
I want no bloodshed. Tell your men to lay down their swords. No one needs to die.
[The Stark men are suddenly slaughtered by the Gold Cloaks. Before Ned can retaliate, Littlefinger approaches him from behind and holds a knife to his throat]
I did warn you not to trust me.
[Tyrion enters the Small Council chamber, whistling "The Rains of Castamere"]
Don't get up! More ravishing than ever, big sister! War agrees with you! [kisses Cersei on the cheek] Excuse the interruption. Carry on.
Cersei Lannister
What are you doing here?
It's been a... remarkable journey! I pissed off the edge of the Wall. I slept in a sky-cell. I fought with the hill tribes! So many adventures, so much to be thankful for!
Cersei Lannister
What are you doing here? This is the Small Council.
Yes, well, I do believe the Hand of the King is welcome at all Small Council meetings.
Cersei Lannister
Our father is Hand of the King!
Yes. But in his absence...
[He hands a small scroll to Varys, who unrolls it]
Your father has named Lord Tyrion to serve as Hand in his stead while he fights—
Cersei Lannister
OUT! All of you, out!
[The rest of the Council leaves hastily as Cersei storms around the table towards Tyrion.]
Cersei Lannister
I would like to know how you tricked Father into this!
If I were capable of tricking Father, I'd be emperor of the world by now. You brought this on yourself.
Cersei Lannister
I've done nothing.
Quite right, you did nothing... when your son called for Ned Stark's head. Now the entire North has risen up against us.
Cersei Lannister
I tried to stop it.
Did you? You failed. That bit of theatre will haunt our family for a generation.
Cersei Lannister
Robb Stark is a child.
Who's won every battle he's fought! Do you understand we're losing the war?
Cersei Lannister
What do you know about warfare?
Nothing. But I know people, and I know that our enemies hate each other almost as much as they hate us.
Cersei Lannister
Joffrey is King.
Cersei Lannister
You are here to advise him.
Only here to advise him. And if the King listens to what I say, the King might just get his uncle Jaime back.
Cersei Lannister
How?
You love your children. It’s your one redeeming quality. That and your cheekbones. The Starks love their children as well, and we have two of them.
Cersei Lannister
One.
Cersei Lannister
Arya, that little animal, she disappeared.
Disappeared? What, in a puff of smoke?! We had three Starks to trade. You chopped one’s head off, and let another escape. Father would be furious. Must be hard for you, to be the disappointing child.
Cersei Lannister
Lord Janos Slynt was Commander of the City Watch. You had no right to exile him!
I have every right. I am the King's Hand.
Cersei Lannister
You're serving as the King's Hand until Father gets here. I am the Queen Regent.
Listen to me, Queen Regent. You're losing the people. Do you hear me?
Cersei Lannister
The people? You think I care?
You might find it difficult to rule over millions who want you dead. Half this city will starve when winter comes, the other half will plot to overthrow you...and your gold-plated thugs just gave them their rallying cry. "The Queen slaughters babies!" You don't even have the decency to deny it! It wasn't you who gave the order, was it? Joffrey didn't even tell you? Did he tell you? I imagine that would be even worse.
Cersei Lannister
He did what needed to be done. You want to be Hand of the King? You want to rule? This is what ruling is, lying on a bed of weeds, ripping them out by the root, one by one, before they strangle you in your sleep.
I'm no king, but I think there's more to ruling than that.
Cersei Lannister
I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK! You've never taken it seriously. You haven't, Jaime hasn't. It's all fallen on me.
As has Jaime repeatedly, according to Stannis Baratheon.
Cersei Lannister
[chuckles and smirks] You're funny. You've always been funny... but none of your jokes will ever match the first one, will they? Do you remember, back when you ripped my mother open on your way out of her and she bled to death?
Cersei Lannister
Mother gone, for the sake of you. There's no bigger joke in the world than that.
[Cersei confronts Tyrion about the marriage pact he made for Myrcella behind her back]
Cersei Lannister
You monster! Myrcella is my only daughter! Do you really think I will let you sell her like a common whore?!
Myrcella is a princess. Some would say she was born for this.
Cersei Lannister
I will not let you ship her off to Dorne as I was shipped off to Robert Baratheon!
Dorne is the safest place for her.
Cersei Lannister
Are you mad? The Martells loathe us.
That's why we need to seduce them. We're going to need their support in the war your son started.
Cersei Lannister
She'll be a hostage.
Cersei Lannister
You won't get away with this. You think the piece of paper father gave you keeps you safe? Ned Stark had a piece of paper, too.
Cersei Lannister
No.
Cersei Lannister
No!
Just how safe do you think Myrcella is if the city falls? Do you want to see her raped and butchered like the Targaryen children? Make no mistake, they will mount her pretty little head on a spike right beside yours.
Cersei Lannister
Get out! [pushes Tyrion back onto the stairs] Get out!
It's just you, me and Joffrey, the "Lord of the Seven Kingdoms and Protector of the Realm".
Cersei Lannister
I'm sure you'll make a point eventually.
He needs to start acting like a king! This war you started is coming to our doorstep and if the entire city wants Joffrey dead–
Cersei Lannister
I'm not the one giving the boy whores to abuse!
I thought the girls might help him.
Cersei Lannister
Did you?
I was wrong! If we can't control him–
Cersei Lannister
Do you think I haven't tried? He doesn't listen to me!
[nodding] It's hard to put a leash on a dog once you've put a crown on its head.
Cersei Lannister
I always hoped he'd be like Jaime. He looks like him, in a certain light.
The boy's more Robert than Jaime.
Cersei Lannister
Robert was a drunken fool, but he didn't enjoy cruelty. Sometimes, I wonder...
Cersei Lannister
If this is the price for what we've done. For our sins.
Cersei Lannister
Wed brother and sister for hundreds of years, I know. It's what Jaime and I would say to each other in our moments of doubt. It's what I told Ned Stark when he was stupid enough to confront me. Half the Targaryens went mad, didn't they? What's the saying? "Every time a Targaryen is born, the gods flip a coin."
You've beaten the odds. Tommen and Myrcella are good, decent children, both of them.
Cersei Lannister
Do you think I'm an idiot?
I'd say you possess above average intelligence.
Cersei Lannister
You shipped off my only daughter. Now you want to send my eldest son to the battlefield to die?
He'll have his Kingsguard protecting him, he has the finest armour gold can buy. He needs to be out there. The men will fight more fiercely seeing their King fighting beside them, instead of hiding behind his mother's skirts.
Cersei Lannister
Do you know why Varys is so dangerous?
Because he has thousands of spies in his employ? Because he knows everything we do before we do it?
Cersei Lannister
Because he doesn't have a cock.
Cersei Lannister
Perhaps I'm dangerous, too. You, on the other hand, are as big a fool as every other man. That little worm between your legs does half your thinking for you.
It's not that little. [Cersei laughs humourlessly] Why are you laughing?
Cersei Lannister
Because I'm happy!
Cersei Lannister
Because I have your little whore.
I thought you preferred blondes.
Cersei Lannister
Such a droll little fellow. Tell me, have you married this one yet? No? Good, Father will be so pleased!
Why do you care who I fuck?
Cersei Lannister
Because a Lannister always pays her debts. You stole my daughter, you plot to have Joffrey killed.
This is madness. Stannis will be here in days. You need me.
Cersei Lannister
For what? Your skill in battle? Pretty thing, your whore. Lovely body; the bruises will heal in time...
Cersei Lannister
Varys isn't the only one who hears whispers. Really, a Lannister lion necklace? You need to hide your secret whores more carefully.
You've forgotten the most important thing about whores.
Cersei Lannister
Oh? Well, you're the expert, tell me.
You don't buy them, you only rent them.
Cersei Lannister
You're usually a better liar, baby brother. This one you like. You like her very much. Could it be love? Don't worry, she'll be treated gently enough... unless Joffrey is hurt, and then every wound he suffers, she'll suffer too. And if he dies, there isn't a man alive who could advise a more painful death for your little cunt.
And how do I know you haven't killed her already?
Cersei Lannister
You'd like to see her? I thought you might. Ser Mandon, bring in my brother's whore.
[Two Kingsguard knights drag in a beaten Ros]
I'm sorry they hurt you. You must be brave. I promise, I will free you.
[The knights drag her out. Tyrion turns to face a grinning Cersei]
I will hurt you for this. A day will come when you think you are safe and happy and your joy will turn to ashes in your mouth... and you will know the debt is paid.
Cersei Lannister
Get out.
What news of Jaime? [All the others remain silent] Twenty thousand unwashed Northerners have known about his escape for weeks. Collectively, you control more spies and informants than the rest of the world combined. Do you mean to tell me that none of you has any notion where he is?
Try harder! What do we have then?
Robb Stark and most of his bannermen are in Riverrun for the funeral of his grandfather, Lord Hoster Tully. In Stark's absence, Roose Bolton holds Harrenhal, which would make him Lord of Harrenhal, in practice if not in name-
Let him have it. The name suits our purposes far more than that useless pile of rubble. The Lord of Harrenhal will make a worthy suitor for the widow Arryn.
For which I am extremely grateful to you, my lord. Lady Arryn and I have known each other since we were children; she has always been positively predisposed towards me.
A successful courtship would make Lord Baelish Acting Lord of the Vale.
Titles do seem to breed titles.
You'll leave for the Eyrie as soon as possible and bring Lysa Arryn into the fold, then the Young Wolf can add his own aunt to the list of people who've taken up arms against him!
Far be it from me to hinder true love, but Lord Baelish's absence would present certain problems. The royal wedding may end up being the most expensive event in living memory. Summer had ended, hard days lie ahead, not a good time to leave the crown's finances unattended.
Fully agreed, which is why I am naming you Master of Coin.
It would appear to be a position that best suits your talents.
I'm quite good at spending money, but a lifetime of outrageous wealth hasn't taught me about managing it!
Cersei Lannister
I have no doubt you will prove equal to this challenge.
You wanted to speak to me?
Cersei Lannister
Yes, about Jaime.
Cersei Lannister
I wanted to make sure we're doing whatever we can to get him back.
When Catelyn Stark took Tyrion prisoner, what did I do in response?
Cersei Lannister
You started a war.
And if I would start a war for that lecherous little stump, what do you think I am doing for my eldest son and heir?
Cersei Lannister
Whatever you can.
[He puts a seal on the letter, pushes it aside, and starts working on another letter.]
Cersei Lannister
Yes.
Cersei Lannister
Did it ever occur to you that I might be the one who deserves your confidence and your trust, not your sons? Not Jaime or Tyrion, but me? Years and years of lectures on family and legacy, same lecture, really, just with tiny, tedious variations. Did it ever occur to you that your daughter might be the only one listening to them, living by them? That she might have the most to contribute to your legacy that you love so much more than your actual children?
[Tywin finishes his letter, and looks over his daughter with his hands folded.]
Cersei Lannister
The Tyrells are a problem.
The Tyrells helped us defeat Stannis Baratheon. The Tyrells helped save your life, and your children's lives.
Cersei Lannister
Margaery has her claws into Joffrey. She knows how to manipulate him.
Good. I wish you knew how to manipulate him. I don't distrust you because you're a woman. I distrust you because you're not as smart as you think you are. You've allowed that boy to ride roughshod over you and everyone else in this city.
Cersei Lannister
Perhaps you should try stopping him from doing what he likes.
You look radiant, your Grace.
Cersei Lannister
Radiant? Why radiant?
It's word that came to mind. We're going to be sisters soon, we should be friends.
Cersei Lannister
You're a musical girl, aren't you? I imagine you have a lovely voice.
A better dancer, than a singer, I'm afraid.
Cersei Lannister
Ah, but you know the song, the Rains of Castamere?
Of course. They play it so often here at court.
Cersei Lannister
So you know the story of House Reyne of Castamere?
Not as well as you, I'm sure.
Cersei Lannister
House Reyne was a powerful family. Very wealthy. Second wealthiest in Westeros. Aren't the Tyrells the second wealthiest family in Westeros now? Of course, ambitious climbers don't want to stop on the second highest rung. If only you could take that final step. You'd see further than all the rest. You'd be alone with nothing but blue sky above you. So Lord Reyne built a castle, as grand as Casterly Rock. He gave his wife diamonds, larger than any my mother ever wore. And finally, one day, he rebelled against my father. Do you know where House Reyne is now?
Cersei Lannister
Gone? A gentle word. Why not say slaughtered? Every man, woman and child, put to the sword. I remember seeing their bodies hanging high above the gates of Casterly Rock. My father let them rot up there all summer. It was a long summer. [Quoting "Rains of Castamere] And now the rains weep o'er their halls, and not a soul to hear." If you ever call me "sister" again, I'll have you strangled in your sleep.
Game of Thrones · 356 quotes
