Do you think I'm an idiot?
I'd say you possess above average intelligence.
You shipped off my only daughter. Now you want to send my eldest son to the battlefield to die?
He'll have his Kingsguard protecting him, he has the finest armour gold can buy. He needs to be out there. The men will fight more fiercely seeing their King fighting beside them, instead of hiding behind his mother's skirts.
Do you know why Varys is so dangerous?
Because he has thousands of spies in his employ? Because he knows everything we do before we do it?
Because he doesn't have a cock.
Neither do you.
Perhaps I'm dangerous, too. You, on the other hand, are as big a fool as every other man. That little worm between your legs does half your thinking for you.
It's not that little. [Cersei laughs humourlessly] Why are you laughing?
Because I'm happy!
And why are you happy?
Because I have your little whore.
I thought you preferred blondes.
Such a droll little fellow. Tell me, have you married this one yet? No? Good, Father will be so pleased!
Why do you care who I fuck?
Because a Lannister always pays her debts. You stole my daughter, you plot to have Joffrey killed.
This is madness. Stannis will be here in days. You need me.
For what? Your skill in battle? Pretty thing, your whore. Lovely body; the bruises will heal in time...
Where did you find her?
Varys isn't the only one who hears whispers. Really, a Lannister lion necklace? You need to hide your secret whores more carefully.
You've forgotten the most important thing about whores.
Oh? Well, you're the expert, tell me.
You don't buy them, you only rent them.
You're usually a better liar, baby brother. This one you like. You like her very much. Could it be love? Don't worry, she'll be treated gently enough... unless Joffrey is hurt, and then every wound he suffers, she'll suffer too. And if he dies, there isn't a man alive who could advise a more painful death for your little cunt.
And how do I know you haven't killed her already?
You'd like to see her? I thought you might. Ser Mandon, bring in my brother's whore.
[Two Kingsguard knights drag in a beaten Ros]
I'm sorry they hurt you. You must be brave. I promise, I will free you.
Don't forget me.
Never.
[The knights drag her out. Tyrion turns to face a grinning Cersei]
I will hurt you for this. A day will come when you think you are safe and happy and your joy will turn to ashes in your mouth... and you will know the debt is paid.
Get out.
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