[as David Bowie] Wear the eye patch, Bret, wear the funky, funky eye patch.
[as David Bowie] So, you showed your penis to the man from the greeting card company.
That was your idea.
JBJemaine Bowie
I didn't mean something like that, I only meant something like... I don't know, wear make-up, or—
Yeah, I was wearing make-up... I had lightning bolts on my wanger.
JBJemaine Bowie
I meant on your face, Bret... On your face.
Can I please have a look at the lyrics? [Looks at notepad] This is another one of your weird songs, man.
In what way?
What's that about 'Sometimes I put a wig on you when we're on tour'?
Put a wig on you? No. It didn't say anything like that.
That's definitely a bit gay.
What is?
Putting a wig on me while I'm asleep.
I think, sometimes you hear what you wanna hear. It wouldn't be gay to put a wig on a man and pretend they're a woman. How could that be gay if you're pretending they're a woman? Not that I did it.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Flight of the Conchords pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.