Father Ted
Father Jack, where did you get the air freshener?
Father Jack
CAR!
Father Ted
Oh, god...
Father Jack
Drived the car!
Father Ted
Not the new car! Tell me the truth, Father, have you been drinking?
Father Jack
(looks at the half-empty bottle of whisky he's holding and thinks for a moment) YES!
Father Ted
Tell me from the beginning. Where did you drive?
Father Jack
Shops! Drink! Corner! Shops! Got out! TRUCK!
Father Ted
A truck?!
Father Jack
(smashing two empty cans of lager together) TWO trucks!!!
Father Ted
Let's take a look. See if there's anything we can salvage.
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