That's enough of your "poor me" bullshit!
What did I do?!
Frank Murphy. This family supported you these past few weeks when all you could do was talk about Buster Thunder! So it didn't work out! And now you blame him for your shitty mood. There's always somebody to blame. Bob Pogo, or Roger Dunbarton...
Grandma Nora.
The Beatles.
Johnny Unitas that one time.
Now Bill, I've told you a thousand times, that was Earl Morrall's fault! [getting angrier and louder] Christ's sake, they put Unitas in at the end of the game, he almost pulled it out! Shit, if they put him in earlier, like they should have, they would've won instead of losing to Joe Willie Namath, THAT PANTYHOSE-WEARING FUCKING JACKASS!
[Brief silence; the rest of the family stare back at Frank in disapproval]
What?! It's true!
But your favorite person to blame is your father. Well, he's not here - but we are. All we want is to have a nice Christmas as a family, but you chose to mope around all day.
[furiously] IT'S NOT MY CHOICE, SUSAN! LIFE DECIDES!
[Megan starts crying]
Nice going, Frank. Hell of a first Christmas for your daughter.
[quietly, ashamed over his tirade] Maybe I should take a drive or something... clear my head.
Nobody here is stopping you.
More from this episode
More F Is for Family quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's F Is for Family pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.