I, I cough, cough I've lost my voice!
PPHB
Sorry son, I couldn't hear you! Mhm, mhm, mhm.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
PPHB
At this time it gives me great pleasure to do this.
PPHB
Their sacrifices are a inspiration to us all — not to mention the cost-savings that go directly to the bottom line.
PPHB
Secondly, we've stocked the first aid kits with these new wonder-drugs — placebos [pronounced plah-see-bos].
I'll bet you 20 dollars it doesn't feel good to give. [extends hand]
You are on, my cynical friend! [shakes Dogbert's hand]
Okay, to settle the question, give me 40 dollars and then tell me if it feels good.
That wouldn't feel good.
Okay, then give me 20 dollars because you lost the bet.
Dilbert [puzzled look]: Did I just make a bet that would cost me 20 dollars whether I won or not? [hands Dogbert a $20 bill]
Dogbert [taking the money]: Yes. But you also got to help someone more fortunate than yourself.
JLJay Leno
And you've heard about this guy? Well, he's sort of a guy. And he's reportedly a surrogate mother for an alien, hilbilly, robot, engineer, cow baby. Michael Jackson already has an order in for three of them! Part cow, part engineer...now do you think it'll spend a lot of the nights surfing the internet and milking itself?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Dilbert pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.