Lwaxana Troi quotes from Deep Space Nine

Odo

Madam, I am not like you! Every sixteen hours, I turn into a liquid!

Lwaxana Troi

I can swim.

Quark

Not my ear! Please!

Lwaxana Troi

Yes, I know where it hurts the most, you little troll.

Lwaxana Troi

What are you looking at?.

Odo

Oh, I was just wondering how many volts are in that exposed socket.

Lwaxana Troi

Zanthi Fever?!? Oh, that— that's ridicu- that's impossible. That only affects older Betazoids.

Julian Bashir

Well, that may be, but according to my tests, you show all the symptoms. Zanthi Fever is a virus which affects the empathic abilities of um... mature Betazoids. It causes them to project their emotions onto others.

Benjamin Sisko

Then Mrs. Troi's amorous feelings for— [knowing smile] someone on the station were being passed along to the people around her.

Julian Bashir

Not everyone, only those within close proximity to her when she had an attack; and even then, there would have had to have been some pre-existing latent attraction.

Benjamin Sisko

[concerned] You're saying Dax—

Julian Bashir

Only on a subconscious level. Best not think about it too much, if you ask me.

Lwaxana Troi

I'm terribly sorry, Commander. I hope I haven't caused too much trouble.

Benjamin Sisko

I'm sure no permanent harm was done. Right, Doctor?

Julian Bashir

A simple wide-spectrum anti-viral agent should cure Mrs. Troi, and as for everyone else, well, they'll be back to normal in a day or two. Excuse me. [to Sisko] I promised Nerys that I'd meet her in her quarters this evening.

Benjamin Sisko

[stopping him] I think you ought to postpone that visit... for a day or two.

Julian Bashir

[disappointed sigh]