Julian Bashir quotes from Deep Space Nine

Julian Bashir

The truth is, I'm a fraud.

Miles O'Brien

You're not a fraud. I don't care how many enhancements your parents had done. Genetic recoding can't give you ambition or a personality or compassion or any of the things that make a person truly human.

Julian Bashir

So, I guess it's your game again.

Miles O'Brien

What's that? Five in a row?

Julian Bashir

At least.

Miles O'Brien

Wait a minute. You haven't been letting me win, have you?

Julian Bashir

What makes you think that?

Miles O'Brien

You said your hand-eye coordination had been genetically enhanced.

Julian Bashir

Well, maybe I have been letting you win, a little bit.

Miles O'Brien

I don't believe it. I don't need you to patronize me. I can play at your level.

Julian Bashir

I never said you couldn't.

Miles O'Brien

Well, play then. Really play!

Miles O'Brien

Alright, from now on, you play from over here,

Miles O'Brien

I play from up here,

Miles O'Brien

If that doesn't work, we'll try a blindfold.

Bashir

What is this all about, Odo? You didn't come here to talk to me about women. [Odo looks away] Did you? [realizing] Aaah. This is about "Bedroom Eyes", isn't it?

Odo

Who told you about her? Kira?

Bashir

Nope.

Odo

Dax.

Bashir

Actually, it was Miles.

Bashir

[continuing] If people are talking, it's only because they care. You put on a good front. But anyone who really knows you can tell that you're lonely. If you're interested in this woman, you have to let her know.

Odo

I can't.

Bashir

Why not?

Odo

What if I— What if she—

Bashir

Rejects you? She might. But you can't go through life trying to avoid getting a broken heart. If you do, it'll break from loneliness anyway. So you might as well take the chance. If you don't, she'll move on and you'll never know what you might have had. And living with that is worse than having a broken heart. Believe me.

Kira

He fought for every last second. I don't even think he knew I was there.

Bashir

He knew. You gave him what he needed. He didn't die alone.

Kira

Maybe he gave me something I needed too. I missed my father's death by less than an hour. Did you know that? Less than an hour. I always told myself that it was bad luck, bad timing, the will of the Prophets. But the truth is, I didn't have to go when I did. I could have stayed a while longer. I saw my chance to get out and I took it. I saw so much death during the occupation, I felt so much pain. But my father, he was my strength, and I couldn't stand to see that strength slipping away. So I ran.

Bashir

Just like you tried to run from Ghemor.

Kira

He reminded me so much of my father. Going through it again, I just couldn't face it.

Bashir

But in the end, you did. You were there for Ghemor.

Kira

I owed it to him. I owed it to my father to get it right this time.

Quark

Did you catch him?

Odo

We caught him. Or rather, Major Kira caught him.

Kira

I didn't really do anything. I was in the Bajoran shrine, meditating, and he burst in, stark naked, fell to his knees, crying out to the Prophets for protection!

Bashir

Morn, of all people. Who would've thought he'd just snap like that?

Odo

Certainly not me. Which leads me to wonder, what could have pushed him over the edge? [looks pointedly at Quark]

Quark

Why are you looking at me? I'm the victim here! [Odo scoffs] He hit me with a bar stool!

Kira

Why did he hit you?

Quark

I don't have the faintest idea.

Kira

Think harder.

Odo

Witnesses say you were talking to him right up until the moment he went berserk.

Quark

Of course I was talking to him. That's what bartenders are supposed to do—talk to their customers.

Kira

What exactly was it that you were talking to him about?

Quark

All I said was that the military personnel on this station were starting to look a little nervous. When they get nervous, I get nervous.

Odo

And that's all you said?

Quark

Basically. [beat] I might've done some harmless theorizing.

Bashir

About what?

Quark

Oh, something like it was only a matter of time until the Dominion launched a full-scale assault on the Federation, and when that happened, this station would undoubtedly be their first target. [long pause] And I might've idly suggested that there wasn't a chance in hell of any of us getting out of here alive.

Odo

And that's when Morn hit you with a bar stool and ran onto the Promenade screaming, "We're all doomed"?

Quark

...Some people just don't react well to stress.

You're not genetically engineered. You're a Vulcan.

Julian Bashir

If I'm a Vulcan, then how do you explain my boyish smile?

Not so boyish anymore, Doctor.

Dr. Julian Bashir

(as he is preparing for surgery on Keevan, several Jem'Hadar soldiers gather around) I'm not going to hurt him.

Keevan

They're not here to protect me. They've just never seen what the inside of a Vorta looks like.

That's the eleventh ship to fall out of formation.

How nice of you to keep track of it.

Bashir

He can't help being negative. It's in his nature.

On the contrary, Doctor. I always hope for the best. Experience, unfortunately, has taught me to always expect the worst.

Miles O'Brien

"Cannon to the right of them, Cannon to the left of them, Cannon in front of them, Volley'd and thunder'd..."

Julian Bashir

"Storm'd at with shot and shell, Boldly they rode and well, Into the jaws of Death, Into the mouth of Hell, Rode the six hundred."

Nog

Whatever it is you're quoting, I wish you'd stop!

Uh, Chief? How does that poem end?

O'Brien

You don't want to know.

Julian Bashir

There's nothing more romantic than a wedding on DS9 in the springtime.

Miles O'Brien

When the neutrinos are in bloom.

Julian Bashir

Miles?

Miles O'Brien

Yeah?

Julian Bashir

It works. I've had a vision about the future. I can see it so clearly.

Miles O'Brien

What is it?

Julian Bashir

I'm going to kill Worf. I'm going to kill Worf! That’s what I'm going to do. I see it so clearly!

Miles O'Brien

Kill Worf.

Julian Bashir

Yeah, kill Worf.

Would someone please shoot me and put me out of my misery?

Oh, how I long for a gun.

Miles O'Brien

Are you telling me I'm going to be this bloody tall for the rest of my life?

Julian Bashir

[indicating smaller] This bloody tall, actually.

Julian Bashir

This conduit’s filthy, Chief. Don’t you ever clean up in here?

Jadzia Dax

All right, all right. Let’s not badger the Chief.

Miles O’Brien

Thank you!

Julian Bashir

I’m sorry. It was very small of me.

Odo

Are you sure that you two returned to your original height?

Miles O'Brien

Why do you ask?

Odo

It's just that you both seem to be a couple of centimeters shorter. A Changeling notices these sort of things.

Quark

Actually now that I think about it, you both do seem a little on the petite side.

Julian Bashir

Infirmary.

Quark

[to Odo] And they say you don't have a sense of humor.