Cy Tolliver quotes from Deadwood

Cy Tolliver

How about a nap, a bath and sex with a unfamiliar woman?

Cy Tolliver

[Watching Bullock and Al fight] Awful possibility in these matters is both men sustaining mortal injury... [After the fight] But I'm rarely that fucking lucky.

Cy Tolliver

[on seeing a gang of Pinkertons ride into camp] Take them amateurs off the fucking sugar tit. Mr. Hearst brought the pros to town.

Al Swearengen

Let me say this once in your hearing. For outright stupidity, the whole fuckin' trial concept goes shoulder to shoulder with that cocksucker Custer's thinkin' when he headed for that ridge.

Cy Tolliver

It's got its disadvantages.

Al Swearengen

We're illegal. Our whole goal is to get annexed to the United fuckin' States. We start holdin' trials, what's to keep the United States fuckin' Congress from sayin' "Oh, excuse us, we didn't realize you were a fuckin' sovereign community and nation out there. Where's your cocksucker's flag? Where's your fuckin' navy or the like? Maybe when we make our treaty with the Sioux, we should treat you people like renegade fuckin' Indians. Deny your fuckin' gold and property claims. And hand everything over instead to our ne'er-do-well cousins and brothers-in-law."

Cy Tolliver

That we don't want.

Al Swearengen

Sometimes I wish we could just hit 'em over the head, rob 'em, and throw their bodies in the creek.

Cy Tolliver

But that would be wrong.

Seth Bullock

May I speak?

Cy Tolliver

Mr. Bullock.

Seth Bullock

I was a marshal in Montana, my father served in the British Royal Army, and my brother Robert was a cavalryman, killed fighting the Comancheros in Texas.

Why are you here, Mr. Bullock?

Seth Bullock

A man named Otis Russell is laid up in this establishment, he needs protection.

Protection from whom?

Seth Bullock

Several in this camp. I beat him badly. Others have reason to wish him dead, and the camp sheriff can be bought off for half a can of bacon grease.

Well, while we're here, I will hold Mr. Russell under protection, as a gesture to your brother's sacrifice.

Seth Bullock

Thank you, sir.

I would add, in a camp, where the sheriff can be bought for bacon grease, a man, a former marshal, who understands the danger of his own temperament, might consider serving his fellows. We all have bloody thoughts.

Cy Tolliver

Suck some pricks if you like. Keep whatever they give you as my way of saying welcome.

Any blind ones out there?

Francis Wolcott

You've approached a group in San Francisco that does business with my employer.

Cy Tolliver

That group and employer bullshit really quickens me with fuckin' trust.

Wolcott

That group you've approached is a fraternal Chinese organization.

Tolliver

"Tong" is not a clever enough word?

Wolcott

You offered them a contract to send members to this camp. That organization has a pre-existing arrangement with my employer.

Tolliver

So you work for who, Wolcott? The railroads? Some mining combination that brings those slant-eyes in by the boatload?

Wolcott

No, sir. I work for one man.

Cy Tolliver

Now that's an attitude right there I want us to counsel on. Smart-alecky sort of attitude and almost with a quality of.. fuckin' anger to it. I don't find the exact fuckin' words for it, but it fuckin' disturbs and concerns me.

Francis Wolcott

By my lights, I feel I manage well.

Cy Tolliver

Well, you can say that, Mr. Wolcott, yet I hear accounts that you're a dangerous lay, and that adds to my feeling disturbed. Are you inclined, sir, every so often to.. 'ride one off the cliff'? Girls, I mean.

Francis Wolcott

I am disturbed at my private conduct being spoken of.

Cy Tolliver

Well, I should think you fuckin' would be. And to think of Mr. Hearst's disturbance if he was to fuckin' know. Because, that's a dangerous habit to indulge when you're not among friends.

Francis Wolcott

Are you my friend, Mr. Tolliver?

Cy Tolliver

And someone past surprise at habits or inclination, or turns of events, and who don't confuse himself far as sitting in judgment with our Lord in fuckin' heaven.

Francis Wolcott

I see

Cy Tolliver

And who would never tattle to your employer or jeopardize what's got to be a handsome fuckin' income. God damn right, I am your friend, Mr. Wolcott. All I can't provide for the party is the cliff.

Francis Wolcott

Believing yourself past surprise does not commend you to me as a friend. A man inadequately sophisticated or merely ignorant, or simply stupid, may believe himself past surprise, then be surprised to discover, for example, that Mr. Hearst already knows of my inclinations and finds them immaterial. Suggesting as a corollary that your skills for blackmail and manipulation no longer are assets to you, and for your fatuous belief in their efficacy, in fact have become liabilities. In short, you've overplayed your hand. Now I should think, in consequence, now recognizing yourself as a man past his time, that during this last transitional period you would devote yourself with grateful and quiet diligence to such uses as others may still find you suitable.

Francis Wolcott

On my order, Mr. Tolliver, Lee will burn this building, mutilating you before, during or after as I specify, or when he chooses unless I forbid.

Cy Tolliver

Oh, my full attention is at your disposal.

Silas Adams

Horsemen come to camp by torchlight last night.

Cy Tolliver

Tell Al as we didn't wake to the apocalypse, I suppose all we need fear is their Winchesters.