TV QuotesDatabase
S2 E11

Dan Vs. · Season 2, Episode 11

“The Dinosaur” quotes from Dan Vs.

3 quotes

“The Dinosaur” · Season 2, Episode 11

In this episode: Dan (2), Chris (1)

DWDock Worker 1

We gotta take a look! You know what I heard what's inside?

DWDock Worker 2

For the last time, we ain't suppose to look in the crates!

DWDock Worker 1

I'll tell you what. I'll give you three hints.

DWDock Worker 2

Can we drop this?! I’m gonna be late for pilates!

DWDock Worker 1

Hint one: It's ain't supposed to exist Hint two: He's half spider, half man Hint three: He fights crime.

DWDock Worker 2

Give me a break! Spider-

DWDock Worker 1

Shhh! You're gonna wake him up.

DWDock Worker 2

He’s a fictional character!

DWDock Worker 1

Word on the dock is he's based on a real guy. I gotta get an autograph. [opens the latch as the dinosaur escapes]

DWDock Worker 2

You’re gonna need a bigger pen.

A dinosaur, [finds out that his car was destroyed] JUST RUINED MY CAR! YOU BETTER HAVE GOOD AUTO INSURANCE! Wait. Where are you going? We have to exchange information! [the dinosaur leaves Dan's neighborhood] DINOSAUR!

[finds Dan outside] Dan! Are you alright?

Absolutely not. I have been wronged Chris. Horribly, horribly, wrong!

Yeah, sorry about that. Ben's just-

By a dinosaur.

Learning to- What?

I saw it with my own eyes. And I trust my eyes, Chris. A mid-sized tyrannosaurid theropod, probably female. She ruined my car and she's going to pay. I haven't figured out how exactly because I doubt a T-Rex carries a wallet. Not with those- stupid little arms.

You don't seriously expect me to believe you saw a dinosaur, do you?

Since when do I care what to believe? I just need a ride.

I'm in the middle of giving Ben a driving lesson.

Which is clearly a huge success. Besides, you hate Ben. You always talk about how annoying he is behind his back.

I do not. I don't.

BBen

Whatever, fatso.

I am giving Ben a lesson because I love my brother-in law and because Elise has a work thing.

This is perfect! Ben needs to drive around town, I need to get around town. Question is: are you willing to drive fast, break the law as necessary and avoid dinosaur attacks?

BBen

I mean, I've avoided them up to now.

Dan, Ben can't have any distractions while he's driving. That includes chasing your hallucinations.

Get in, Ben. There's no room in this car for doubting Thomases.

[Ben gets inside Chris' car]

I don't know what you think you saw, but it's scientifically impossible for dinosaurs to exist.

These quotes come from Wikiquote's Dan Vs. pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.