Lindsay Monroe quotes from CSI: NY

Lindsay

I just found out they're putting Danny on modified assignment.

Mac

It's part of procedure, Lindsay. It doesn't mean anything.

Lindsay

But there's going to be a hearing, and maybe even criminal charges. This is like a natural disaster, Mac. You see it coming, and you can't do anything to stop it.

Mac

Yeah, I know it feels like that now, but there's a long road to go before anything's decided here.

Lindsay

Danny's career is on the line, and I don't even know why. He didn't do anything wrong.

Mac

I know.

Lindsay

I got good news and bad news, Sheldon. Good news is, this fiber looks like something Adam pulled off Pete Miller's clothing.

Hawkes

What's the bad news?

Lindsay

It means I can't work this case anymore.

Lindsay

If you find the gun, it will clear Officer Cooper.

Hawkes

Clears them all.

Lindsay

Well, not necessarily. I mean, even if you close this case today, it's still an embarrassment for the department. They're still gonna want to point the finger at somebody.

Hawkes

For what?

Lindsay

You have any idea how many administrative regulations there are, Sheldon? I do, 'cause I stayed up all night reading about them.

Hawkes

Look, Lindsay, I know you're worried, okay? But we're scientists, and there's no empirical evidence to suggest Internal Affairs is on a witch hunt.

Lindsay

Well, I hope you're right.

Adam

You ever dance with the green fairy?

Lindsay

I can't help you, Adam.

Adam

I'm talking about absinthe. It's the 19th century version of magic mushrooms.

Lindsay

Adam, what do you get when you have a sergeant involved in a shooting, his wife who works in the crime lab and an IAB investigation? Conflict of interest.

Adam

Oh, oh. I'm... Oh, I'm sorry. I... Is he okay?

Lindsay

Oh, yeah, he's fine. He's got a couple stitches in his head. He's gonna give a statement to Internal Affairs.

Adam

All right, well, you tell him that we're all thinking about him.

Lindsay

I will. Thanks, Adam. Tell EDNA I said hello.

Lindsay

Let me take you to the hospital.

Danny

I'm fine, babe. I got to stay here for them.

Lindsay

There's nothing you can do for them now, honey, except maybe bleed all over them.

She's right, Sergeant Messer. Can't mess around with a head injury. I'm Lieutenant Adler, Internal Affairs. How you doing?

Danny

It's not… it's not a head injury.

Great. Then you won't mind answering a few questions.

Lindsay

Actually, he does mind. We're on our way to the E.R.

You're not going to make me pull rank here, are you? You know you got to talk to me.

Lindsay

Look, Lieutenant. According to regulations, he has 24 hours before he can be compelled to make a statement. So he can talk to you then.

Danny

(Processing a bicycle) Hey, so what do you think of this fancy getaway vehicle?

Lindsay

Doesn't exactly seem like the expected mode of travel for a Russian hit man.

(About Ali Rand) Think she's lying about the drugs?

Lindsay

It's not what I think, it's what the science says.

What are you going to do about the hearing tomorrow?

Lindsay

I'm gonna tell the truth. Based on what she just told us, the levels of GHB in her blood... they're not improbable. They're impossible.

Mac

Ali didn't just lie about the GHB, she lied about when she was beaten, too.

Lindsay

Mac, she's lying about everything.

Lindsay

Who called it in?

Adam

Couple from Iowa, in town to see Spider-Man on Broadway, after a walk in the park. Odds were pretty good they were going to see a dead body either way.

Adam

It's probably not premeditated, right? I mean, it'd be strange if someone planned to kill her with a rock.

You never know. Perp might have been following her. Could have snuck up behind her and, bang, lights out.

Lindsay

The result of a heated argument.

Adam

Unsatisfied customer (Lindsay gives him a look) What? She's a call girl.

Lindsay

Don't make me sorry I brought you out here.

(About Ali Rand) If she really did fabricate the rape story, there's definitely one guy who would want to confront her.

Lindsay

And John Curtis just got released on bail.

Lindsay

Hey, Sid, have you ever seen someone punch herself in the face?

Sid

Uh, no. Are you going to punch yourself in the face?

Lindsay

It's pink ivory. It's one of the three rarest varieties on the planet. It's grown almost entirely in Southern Africa and it's the sovereign tree of the Zulu Nation.

Mac

Should I put a BOLO out on the Zulu royal family?

Lindsay

The traditional weapon from Southern Africa is called a knob kerrie. It's a cross between a club and a walking stick.

Mac

Similar to the Shillelagh in Ireland, considered a gentleman's weapon.