PPoliceman
I've applied to be on Masterchef. I even met Loyd Grossman once.
Well, don't worry; we won't tell anyone.
He dies. Everton Stonehead RIP.
Now, Gareth...
Look at that! It's not a person; it's a smirk on legs. He's unbearable! Two years of being a useless pain in the arse in my kitchen and now this.
Now, Gareth...
And listen to this: "I do feel the restraints of not having my own kitchen and having to conform to a dated and restricted cuisine!"
Now, Gareth, don't sack him straight away.
I'm not going to sack him straight away. I'm going to kill him straight away. Slowly and wickedly, revealing a hitherto unsuspected vicious strain of sadism in my psychological make-up.
Unsuspected?
Then I'll sack him, appending his P45 to his mutilated remains as a compassionate gesture, so only his nearest and dearest can identify him.
[Janice and Gareth are in the dining room after tricking Everton into running service hoping it will teach him a lesson]
What a disaster.
I know.
In my own restaurant. This is all your fault.
That's right blame me.
Well I do blame you. Give him a little rope you said, now look what's happened.
I know!
Everything absolutely...perfect!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Chef! pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.