[Castle walks into the station carrying two coffees. Natalie is writing on the "murder board", Beckett eyes at her uneasily]
N Natalie
[Takes a coffee] Thanks, Castle!
[Stunned at her audacity] Tha--that's, I was-- uh... you're welcome?
[Beckett looks shocked and distraught]
N Natalie
Ryan and Esposito are digging into Tanya Wellington.
[Directly addressing Beckett] Mmm, what about Duke Jones? Did his neighbour confirm his romantic evening?
N Natalie
[Cuts her off] So did a couple of other neighbours, who complained about the noise. So it looks like Duke Jones allibis out.
[Put out] What she said. [To Castle] Can we talk for a second?
[Beckett loops her arm through his and quickly leaves the room, ending up frantically dragging him into another room]
She took my coffee , Castle!
Then what's next? My soul?! Everything I do, she does. Even when I'm thinking I can feel her in my head like some kind of a brain-eating parasite from one of her movies!
[Natalie walks in dressed up as Beckett, with a brunette wig and similar suit. Castle's and Beckett's jaws drop.]
Just like I dreamed it! [They both stare at him] Did I say that out-loud?
[So shocked that she spits out her coffee] I'm sorry, what? No. No!
N Natalie
Then you two are an item, but you're sworn to secrecy, right?
No, we are not an item. Why?
N Natalie
[Sighs] Last night I invited him back to my place. And he said something to me I have never heard from a man before.
[Raises her eyebrows] No?
N Natalie
I don't get it! He's into you, but you're determined not to give into these feelings that you clearly have for him. So he fantasizes about you through his writing. It's literally verbal masturbation.
Uh--okay, so what does this have to do with me?
N Natalie
[Indicates her "Beckett costume"] I am not wearing this getup for my health. You're Nikki Heat, he's Jameson Rook. I need to sleep with him in the name of character research. Can you talk to him?
N Natalie
[Shrugs] I dunno, give him permission or something.
[Beckett is momentarily speechless]
I have to go. Over there. [She disappears in a random direction]
[Watching Natalie at the murder board] Do I really do that?
If it's so adorable, why didn't you sleep with me? [Castle looks momentarily puzzled] Her me, not me me.
Oh, well a fictional character that I wrote, based on you, played by Natalie Rhodes? It's just way too... meta.
[Ryan walks in] We should have a code word so we all know what Beckett to kill when the clone army attacks
Unless we make a preventive strike
Get through to Jenny yet?
She's still not picking up
Don't worry, you'll be laughing about it soon enough
Thanks. So I've been running through all Stacy's clients files. Three couples had filed for divorce within the last month, can you believe it? You marry the love of your life and next thing you know they're cheating on you
Sorry, anyway two of the guts have rock-solid alibies and the third divorce has nothing to do with cheating
[Esposito walks in] What you guys doing?
Hiding from creepy Beckett
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