I'm sorry, dad. I'm just doing what you taught me. Michael Patrick O'Malley, I hereby place you under arrest.
S1 E23The Case of The Big Frame-Up
Brian O'Malley: If the commissioner doesn't want you grandpa, that's her loss. To me, your still the greatest cop in the world.
The green button says door. The red one says danger. But if I don't do what Nightshade says... [opens the cover to the danger button] ...I'll be in danger. [presses the danger button. Alarm suddenly goes off] Oops, wrong button.
Do this! Do that! How come why I get all the crummy jobs?
MOMickey O' Malley
What are you doing lolly-gagging around here while there's criminals to be caught!?
I think we've created a monster.
What can I do? He's Family!
S1 E31The Case of The Iceberg Pirates
MDMayor Davis
Ms. Horton, take a memo.
Cool!
This cold is getting into his brains.
What? You never heard of Iceberg Lettuce?
Oh really? I didn't know you can grow that stuff on an iceberg.
S1 E46The Case of The Runaway Buzzbomb
If you want wrong-doing done right, you have to wrong-do it yourself.
S2The Case of The Crooked Contest
Oh...Bummer!
S2The Case of The Lawless Lady
Kiss me you dumb cop.
S2 E3The Case of Mace's Romance
[narrating] The Empire City Charity Ball was going to raise money for the homeless. But the Big Boss wanted the money for his favorite charity: himself!
Why that great, big, fat bucket of lard! He kidnapped my sister!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's C.O.P.S. (1988) pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.