Long Feng quotes from Avatar: The Last Airbender

Sokka

Why won't you let us talk to the King?! We have information that could defeat the Fire Nation!

Long Feng

The Earth King has no time to get involved in political squabbles and the day-to-day minutia of military activities.

Aang

This could be the most important thing he's ever heard!

Long Feng

What's most important to His Royal majesty is maintaining the cultural heritage of Ba Sing Se. All his duties relate to issuing decrees on such matters. It's my job to oversee the rest of the city's resources... including the military.

Katara

So the King is just a figurehead.

He's your puppet!

Long Feng

Oh, no, no! His majesty is an icon, a god to his people. He can't sully his hands with the hourly changes of an endless war.

Sokka

But we found out about a solar eclipse that will leave the Fire Nation defenseless! You could lead an invasion-

Long Feng

[stands up] Enough. I don't want to hear your ridiculous plan. It is the strict policy of Ba Sing Se, that the war not be mentioned inside these walls. [As he speaks, the Dai Li take Jet to a secret facility] Constant news of an escalating war will throw the citizens of Ba Sing Se into a state of panic.

Jet

[as the Dai Li strapped him into a chair] You have to believe me! They're Firebenders! They won't stop until they win the war!

Dai Li Agent

[to Jet] Calm down. You're safe now. [a light begins rotating in front of Jet at eye level]

Long Feng

Our economy would be ruined. Our peaceful way of life, our traditions, would disappear.

Dai Li Agent

[to Jet] There's no war in Ba Sing Se.

Jet

What are you talking about?! Where do you think all the refugees come from? You can't hide it! [The Dai Li gag him as the light continues to rotate]

Long Feng

In silencing talk of conflict, Ba Sing Se remains a peaceful, orderly utopia... the last one on Earth.

Dai Li Agent

[to Jet, muffled] There is no war within the walls. Here, we are safe. Here, we are free.

Katara

You can't keep the truth from all these people. They have to know!

Aang

I'll tell them! I'll make sure everyone knows

Long Feng

Until now, you've been treated as our honored guest. But from now on, you will be watched by Dai Li agents. If you mention the war to anyone, you will be expelled from the city. I understand you've been looking for your bison? It would be quite a shame if you were unable to complete your quest. [Aang glares at him] Now, Joo Dee will show you home.

Come with me, please.

Katara

What happened to Joo Dee?

I'm Joo Dee. I'll be your host as long as you're in our wonderful city.

Long Feng

Now comes the part where I double cross you. Dai Li, arrest the Fire Nation princess. [pauses out as The Dai Li don't move] I said arrest her! [short pause as The Dai Li Agents don't move again; failed] What is wrong with you?!

Azula

It's because they haven't made up their minds. They're waiting to see how this is going to end.

Long Feng

What are you talking about?!

Azula

I can see your whole history in your eyes. You were born with nothing, so you've had to struggle, and connive, and claw your way to power. But true power, the divine right to rule, is something you're born with. The fact is, they don't know which one of us is going to be sitting on that throne, and which one is going to be bowing down. But I know, and you know. [She sits on the Earth King's throne] Well? [She and Long Feng lock eyes; after a long moment, Long Feng kneels before her]

Long Feng

... You've beaten me at my own game.

Azula

Don't flatter yourself. You were never even a player.

Long Feng

By the way, I'm Long Feng. I'm a cultural minister to the king.

Katara

I'm Kua Mai, and this is [gestures to Toph]...Dum.