“What Ifs & Where's Austin” quotes from Austin & Ally

Dez

[bangs frying pans together] Rise and shine sleepyheads! Time for Dez's world famous tour bus breakfast!

Trish

What time is it?

Dez

I just told you time for Dez's world famous tour bus breakfast! *bangs frying pans together again and Austin and Trish take them away, but Dez pulls out another pair and bangs those together*

Austin

Dez! Every time you cook it's a complete mess.

Ally

Yesterday you burnt the toast so bad we had to evacuate the bus, then you forgot to put a lid on the blender and splattered smoothies everywhere!

Trish

[pulls blueberry out of her hair] I'm still pulling blueberries out of my hair.

Dez

[takes blueberry and eats it] Well no messes today now how do you like your omelettes?

Austin

Forget it Dez! I'm just gonna go to the diner and get us some breakfast burritos.

Dez

Nonsense I have fresh eggs. [leaves then comes back in with a chicken which makes all the plates break]

Austin

Well, he did say fresh.

Trish

I'm so much better than you. I'm a 10 you're a 2. I'm a queen you're a fool. I'm a throne you're a stool. You'll never be this cool.... NOO! I sing to you on the stage, I'm at the top of my game. I'm a star and you're lame. I am cash you are change. You'll never have my fame... SOO! You wish you were me! Got everything you need, got no time for jealously! AH AH.. yeah YOU WISH YOU WERE ME! [drops mic]

Trish

I don't have anybody... I'm all alone.

Dez

(looks at her sympathetically) You aren't completely alone... I'm still here for you.

Trish

...You're right. You haven't been my assistant... you've been my...

Dez

(excited) Friend?!

Trish

I think we both know you've been more than a friend.

Dez

(gasps)

Trish

(signals for Dez to kiss her)

Dez

(bends down, kisses Trish)

Ally

(walks in, sees Trez kissing)

(pull apart)

Ally

(screams)

(scream)