Aqua Teen Hunger Force · Season 1
“Dumber Days” · Season 1
In this episode: Meatwad (7), Frylock (2), Carl (2), Schoolly D (1)
Shoot, I'm so dumb as hell I'll never get hired in today's fast-paced world. I'm just gonna go inside and wait for my body to die.
[Narrating] Aw, c'mon Meatwad, you can't be that dumb.
[Pan to Meatwad inside Carl's bedroom]
What, is this not my room?
What do you think?
......Yes?
[Carl throws Meatwad out the window]
Well, damn. Maybe Meatwad is that dumb.
Wait a second. This ain't no brain, this is a damn bee's nest.
A book?! No sir! Shake says that books is from the devil, and that TV is twice as fast.
Twice as fast at what?
Information.
[Reading from "The Tiniest Bullfrog"] Jeremy the Bullfrog lived in a tiny swamp on the edge of town. Every day he would dream of playing professional basketball. But he lived in a swamp, far away from the city lights and a major market team.
One look at Niels Bohr's atomic model makes it abundantly clear that there is a way to pass through solid matter. So in summation, we can have our daily tea-party in the fifth dimension.
Knock-knock. Well, I hope I'm--OH MY GOD!
[Meatwad is about 10-15 times his usual size]
Frylock, what a pleasant surprise. I'm just finishing up my symposium. You've met my colleagues, Professor Vanessa and Dr. Dewey.
Yeah, what happened to your body, man?!
Well, it's obvious, isn't it? Thermal expansion.
No, it's not thermal expansion. I know what thermal expansion is.
Okay, fine, I'm sure that you do. Let's see.. how can I explain this without blowing your mind.
Oh yes, please. Dumb it down for me.
Heisenburg's Uncertainty Principle tells us that at a specific curvature of space, knowledge can be transferred into energy--
Heisenburg's Uncertainty--!
...and this is key now...matter.
No it does not!
Well, some people struggle with Heisenburg. [pulls out a yo-yo] Look, here's a toy. It goes up and down on a string. Doesn't that look like fun?
[knocks yo-yo away] Get that out of my face!
Why don't you take that into the other room while the adults are doing important research here.
Oh, I'm sorry Professor! I didn't realize knowledge could also transform you into an arrogant ass!
[levitating a boy in a car with his mind] Quiet! I need complete concentration or the child will die.
[Carl's car crashes on his roof]
Ohh, do not tell me that that is my car up there on the roof!
Okay, we won't.
Get it down!
Okay.
Wait, wait no don't! [car crashes to the ground] DAMMIT!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Aqua Teen Hunger Force pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
