[First lines; at the Boot Camp]
[chanting] Left, left, left, right, left. Recruits smell and that's no lie. Hate your guts gonna make you cry. Call me smart call me inspired. You're gonna march till I get tired. [spoken]I love my job.
[arrives in the car] Hey, sarge. The new recruits are here.
[grins deviously] Fresh meat. [chuckles; climbs aboard the jeeps and drives back to the camp with the soldier]
[The bus arrives, letting new recruits out. The Warner Siblings come out too]
Excuse us. pardon us. Coming through. Ah, summer camp at last! Eight weeks of fun, fun, fun!
[dressed in duck floater] Swimming and canoe racing!
Mosquitoes and bear attacks!
And not just any old camp, [gets the binoculars] boot camp!
Like Imelda Marcos, I've always adored boots. [the sergeant arrives] Hello, nurse! Hi, Mr. Camp Counselor. I'd like size three EEE boots with fringe and little pink bows on the toes, please. [wiggling her toes in the sergeant's face]
Get back in line, soldier!
[sniffs] Ew, who's P-yew?
[The sergeant giggles sheepishly]
Psst. Down here. Say, is there a girls' camp across the lake? You know. "Hello, nurse".
Fall in! [the Warners literally fall to the ground] Get up! [the Warners stand up] Now, fall in! [repeat] Get up and fall in!
[The Warners stand up and fall to the ground at the same time]
Is this part of our camp initiation? Frankly, we'd prefer the spanking machine.
Get up and get in line!
Well why didn't you say that in the first place?
[The Warners stand straight in line]
Who do you think you are?
We think, therefore we are the Warner brothers.
And the Warner sister.
[shakes hands with the sergeant] Glad to make my acquaintance.
[The sergeant's watch falls into Wakko's wrist]
[grunts] Give me that back, you little Gila monster! [takes watch]
All of it, Wakko. [Wakko gives back wallet, id cards, pen, teddy bear underwear, pink shirt, causes the sergeant to become embarrassed with a nervous smile] Excuse me, Mr. Camp Counselor, but, uh, when do we get to sing "Kumbaya"?
I am not a camp counselor! I am your drill instructor! This is the army, soldier!
[realizes] The Army?
Well, it's been fun. Gotta go.
Buh-bye.
[The Warners run off]
Get back here! [grabs them and puts them back in line] From now on, this Army will be your home. I will be your mother, father, aunt and uncle.
A family! [kiss the sergeant] Mwah!
Stop that, you - you - you - What are you, anyway?!
Infested with fleas.
[The sergeant looks at the camera]
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