Scratch quotes from Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog

Scratch

If they escape, you know who'll get blamed!

YOU!

Scratch

Oh, I gotcha now!

Where are the prisoners?

Scratch

Oh, er, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, they're still in there!

Grounder

No, they're not! They...

That is improbable! My sensors cannot sense them!

Scratch

Well, open the door and see! [D.U.F.U.S. opens the cell door and looks in.] Oh, no! YOU let them out! Look! The cell is empty!

Whaaaaaaaaaaaat? I refused that! I have committed an error! That is impossible!

Robotnik

The hedgehog is ours! What a team we make! Robotnik and Quark!

That's Quark and Robotnik!

Robotnik

Join me for a little gloating in Sonic's cell?

I'm inviting you to join me! [towards cell] D.U.F.U.S.! Are you there?

What shall I do? It's Dr. Quark!

Grounder

Lie!

That is against my programming! My circuits are hurting!

Scratch

Well, once Dr. Robotnik and Quark see what YOU did, your circuits will be hurting even more!

Scratch

Dr. Robotnik!

Grounder

Throbbin Screech is on!

Scratch

It's showtime! Bahahaha!

Robotnik

Silence! We're not watching his show; we hate his show!

Grounder

No we don't; it's our very favorite. (Scratch pounds him against the wall.) We'd rather watch reruns of Bart the Barfy Bumblebee any day.

Robotnik

(self-narrating) If Dr. Robotnik can sink this final putt, he'll win the Mobius tournament of champions and win the grand prize of the dictatorship of the universe!

DR. ROBOTNIK! (Robotnik hits his golf ball too hard and it bounces around the room wildly until it bounces off Scratch and Grounders heads and into Robotnick's mouth. He then spits it into the hole)

Grounder

Ooh, nice putt.

Robotnik

Thanks, and now I've got a nice putter for you two! (Robotnik wraps the putter around Scratch and Grounder's necks) What's so important that you had to ruin my golf game?

Robotnik

(in possession of the Chaos Emerald of Invincibility) Hahahahahaha! I love being invincible!

Scratch

Personally, we could live without it.

Robotnik

Before I go back in time to get the next Chaos Emerald, I think I'll humiliate Sonic before the entire kingdom. I can't wait to see the look on that hedgehog's face when I tell him... HE'S GONE?!?

Scratch

I don't think you have to tell him he's gone, your slowness! I think he knows! Bahahahaa!

Robotnik

When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you!

Scratch

Oh, we don't have a mother, stupid!

Grounder

But I want a mamaaa!!!

An unexpected adventure often comes with soup or salad, and a roll.

Grounder

Who?

Scratch

Bert Who!

Grounder

Bert Who?

Robotnik

You got it!

Grounder

Oh, I got it! Bert You Got It!

Robotnik

I've really outdone myself this time! Remind me to award myself the Medal for Excellence in Supreme Rottenness.

Scratch

Didn't you just give yourself that award last week?

Robotnik

Well, make up a better one then!

Robotnik

Have you captured Sonic yet?

Scratch

D'oh! Tell 'im we almost had him!

Grounder

Almost, sir!

Robotnik

ALMOST?!! What kind of nincompoops are you!?!

Grounder

Uh, what kind of nincompoops are we?

Scratch

Sir, I've got a foolproof plan! This time we'll get him... my way!

Robotnik

If you don't, I'll melt you down… MY way!

Scratch

Doh, for the twentieth time, you serve Sonic the chili dog real slow, so I'll have plenty of time to zap him with the stopper zapper! You got it now?

Grounder

Um…

Scratch

Grounder, you're as dumb as a rock!

Grounder

Metamorphic, igneous, or sedimentary?

Scratch

Ingoranteous! [grabs a rock and hits Grounder]

Scratch

You are so dumb!

Grounder

What? What? What did I say?

Grounder

Wait until we see what Dr. Robotnik gets me for bagging that hedgehog!

Scratch

You?! You couldn't bag groceries! Give him to me!

Grounder

He's not going anywhere, fuzz face, cept' back to Dr. Robotnik's lab! Who knows? Maybe he'll turn your buddy into a footstool! [he and Scratch both laugh]

Nobody's turning Sonic into a footstool!

Scratch

[grabs and picks him up by the tails] Out of the way, brat! [throws him aside]

Scratch

Come back!

Grounder

Yeah, runt! Come back here!

Scratch

Hey! Stop shooting! If you hit Sonic, you'll unfreeze him!

Grounder

Huh?

Should've worn your seat belts, fellas.

Grounder

Oh, sorry, officer! We forgot!

Well, I'll give you 2, maybe 3 years in Mobius jail to think about it.

Scratch

Now hold on!

Driving over the speed limit inside a building? That's gonna cost you, too!

Grounder

Oh, no! How much for that?

5, maybe 10 years?

Grounder

Scratch! He's an officer!

Scratch

Ever see an officer with two tails? [reveals Tails]

Grounder

[gasp] The fox brat! I knew that!

Scratch

Did not! You don't know anything! [sees that Tails got away] Hey come back here you dippy little mutt!