El Captain and Lisa in “Rip-Offs”

Ready... aim... fire! (One shot goes off.)

What happened? How come I haven't been shot?

Oh, you see, we only use blank bullets.

Blank bullets? Oh, I should have guessed. You guys are always trying to rip us tourists off. Well, I won't stand for it! I paid for a real firing squad, not one that uses blank bullets. Now, look, when little Sally went on her French Revolutionary tour, they did it right.

They guillotined her and they got a plastic surgeon to sew her head back on. They sewed it on backwards, but it doesn't matter. She still gloats over it about me, and I told her that my South American junta would be better than hers. So we're gonna do it again, and we're gonna do it right!

ALRIGHT! Alright, firing squad. Live ammo, load up! Ready... (to Lisa) You wanna go through with this?

Get on with it before I get really mad and I'll report you to someone higher than you and you'll get it--

AIIIM... (to Lisa) This is your last chance.

Don't interrupt me, don't even ask me again, okay?

FIRE! (Lisa gets shot.)

Now that's better. (She falls to the floor.)