Yes, Prime Minister · Season 1, Episode 5
“A Real Partnership” · Season 1, Episode 5
In this episode: James Hacker (5), Sir Humphrey Appleby (4), Bernard Woolley (4)
[Hacker has just had a stormy cabinet meeting over a sudden financial crisis.]
Bernard, Humphrey should have seen this coming and warned me.
I don't think Sir Humphrey understands economics, Prime Minister; he did read Classics, you know.
What about Sir Frank? He's head of the Treasury!
Well I'm afraid he's at an even greater disadvantage in understanding economics: he's an economist.
[Hacker complains about the MP deputation came to him to ask for a pay rise.]
But aren't they underpaid in fact?
Underpaid? Backbench MPs, Darling, being an MP is a vast subsidised ego trip. It's a job for which you need no qualifications, no compulsory hours of work, no performance standards. A warm room and subsidised meals for a bunch of self-opinionated windbags and busybodies who suddenly find people taking them seriously because they got letters "MP" after their names. How can they be underpaid when there're about two hundred applicants for every vacancy? You could fill every seat twenty times over even if they have to pay to do the job.
[Hacker asks Humphrey about the sudden financial crisis.]
Why the sudden crisis? The Treasury must've seen it coming.
Prime Minister, I'm not the Permanent Secretary to the Treasury. You must ask Sir Frank.
What would Sir Frank say?
It is not for a humble mortal such as I to speculate on the complex and elevated deliberations of the mighty. But in general, I think Sir Frank believes that if the Treasury knows something has to be done, the Cabinet shouldn't have too much time to think about it.
But that's an outrageous view!
Yes, indeed. It's known as Treasury policy.
Suppose the Cabinet has questions?
Well I think Sir Frank's view is that on the rare occasions when the Treasury understands the questions, the Cabinet doesn't understand the answers.
Real reductions in the size of the Service?! It'd be the end of civilisation as we know it!
[Bernard is trying to tell Sir Humphrey about a confidential conversation.]
You're speaking in riddles, Bernard.
Oh, thank you, Sir Humphrey.
That was not a compliment, Bernard!
[Hacker is discussing Humphrey's two responsibilities.]
It's so difficult for me, you see, as I'm wearing two hats.
Yes, isn't that rather awkward for you?
Not if one is in two minds.
Or has two faces.
If there were a conflict of interests which side would the civil service really be on?
The winning side, Prime Minister.
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