Wednesday Addams quotes from Wednesday

Enid Sinclair

[as they’re about to enter the crypt] Ew. What died?

Wednesday Addams

Smells like childhood.

Wednesday Addams

I was told you could teach me how to control my ability.

There is no controlling a raging river. You must learn to navigate it without drowning.

Still as sharp as ever, my pig-tailed prodigy.

Wednesday Addams

[Recognizes the voice and gives a genuine smile] Uncle Fester!

Wednesday Addams

How long have you been stalking me?

Just flew into town this morning and was hit by a wave of nostalgia.

Wednesday Addams

I thought you didn’t go to Nevermore.

I didn’t. Your dad got all the brains. But I used to drop in on him. Usually from the ceiling with a dagger clutched between my teeth. Just to keep him on his toes.

Wednesday Addams

Of course.

He filled me in on what’s been going on. Monsters, murder, mayhem. What fun!

Wednesday Addams

This place belongs to a friend.

You actually made a friend? That poor kid will be going home in a body bag. [Sees a beehive] Ooo, I like a hideout that comes with snacks.

Wednesday Addams

Those bees are hibernating. They're practically Eugene's children. [Fester opens the beehive; firmly] That means do not eat them!

[Closes the beehive] You know, when you give me that death stare of disapproval, you remind me of your mother. Speaking of scary things, do you know what kind of a monster you're dealing with?

Wednesday Addams

I haven't been able to identify it. [unfolds a drawing Xavier made of the monster, shows it to Fester]

Oooooo...It's called a Hyde.

Wednesday Addams

As in Jekyll and Hyde?

Mmmhmm.

Wednesday Addams

You've seen one before?

Oh, yeah. In '83, during my vay-cay at the Zurich Institute for the Criminally Insane. It's where I got my first lobotomy. But you know lobotomies; they’re kind of like tattoos. Can’t just get one.

You know what your problem is?

Wednesday Addams

I would love to hear your piercing insight.

You don’t know who your real friends are. I’ve been on your side since day one. I literally saved your life, I believed your theories when nobody else did, and what do I get in return? Just nothing but suspicion and lies.

Wednesday Addams

Fine. You want honesty? Here it is: Every time the monster's attacked, you've been right there. Starting with Rowan at the Harvest Festival. Then, on Outreach Day, you arrived just minutes after the monster disappeared, yet you say you didn't see it.

I didn't realize proximity was a crime.

Wednesday Addams

Then there's your drawing obsession. You have drawn the monster dozens of times, yet you've never seen it. Or so you claim. You even drew where it lived. Then, when Eugene went to investigate, you tried to kill him so he wouldn't spill your secret.

You think I would hurt Eugene?

Wednesday Addams

Let's not forget your oh-so-convenient appearance after Tyler had been attacked at the Gates mansion.

If I am the monster...then why haven't I killed you?

Wednesday Addams

[Hesitates] ...Because for some reason I cannot fathom or indulge, you seem to like me.

[coldly] What's to like?

Wednesday Addams

Xavier warned me about you, but I didn’t listen.

Ironic now, huh?

Wednesday Addams

Ironic would’ve been framing Xavier for murder while the real Hyde helped me put him away.

Wednesday Addams

I always believed relying on other people to be a sign of weakness. That inevitably they would lead me to disappointment. Turns out I’ve been the disappointment.

Enid Sinclair

Are you kidding me? I’ve learned so much from you. Part of it is admittedly criminal behavior, but most people spend their entire lives pretending to give zero effs, and you literally never had an eff to give.

Enid Sinclair

Will you forget about me?

Wednesday Addams

Enid, the mark you have left on me is indelible. Anytime I grow nauseous at the sight of a rainbow, or hear a pop song that makes my ears bleed, I’ll think of you.

Enid Sinclair

You have to come visit me in San Francisco. It's foggy and rainy every day.

Wednesday Addams

Sounds tempting.

Wednesday Addams

Who's there?

Happy Prank Day, Wednesday.

Wednesday Addams

My crazed stalker is an invisible 13-year old?

We haven't been properly introduced. [does a curtesy] I'm Agnes DeMille, your number one superfan.

Wednesday Addams

You don't seriously expect me to believe you pulled off this elaborate prank solo.

I had a little help with some DaVincis. After I blackmailed them with incriminating SnapChat pics. Perks of being invisible. I just asked myself, "WWWD - What would Wednesday do?" [Both Enid and Bruno are freed]

Enid Sinclair

That's my line, you little psycho!

I knew if I came up with the most twisted game, I'd get your attention. I hope it's lived up to your exacting standards. Admit it, you're a little impressed.

Enid Sinclair

I can't believe we were almost perforated by your fangirl mini-me. [extends her nails into claws] Why don't I return the favor? [Bruno restrains her]

Park your claws, Rainbow Barbie! Besides, I got you some alone time with the pack hottie. Your welcome.

Wednesday Addams

You almost burned my novel at the Founder's Pyre.

That was just an appetizer. This is the main course.

Wednesday Addams

Then why kill Galpin and place his eyeball on Enid's cushion?

Enid Sinclair

[disgusted] That eyeball was real?!

[confused] I didn't kill Galpin. I wanted to become your friend. Not your next murder case. [she reaches in her jacket pocket and whips out Galpin's phone] Took this as a souvenir. [hands the phone to Wednesday which she accepts] I already scrolled through his texts...and his emails.

Wednesday Addams

[sensing that Agnes was telling the truth] So, if you didn't kill him, then who did?

I can help you find out. [gives a slight chuckle]

Enid Sinclair

Only Wednesday Addams would have multiple stalkers.

Room for one more?

Enid Sinclair

[still angry at Agnes almost killing the two] Wannabes take the stairs. [closes the door and lowers the elevator leaving Agnes behind]