Ryan and Stephanie in “Lord of The Ring Toss”

[after successfully tossing a ring onto a narwhal's tusk] Yes! I put us into first place!

Can we go now or do you want to stay and build a statue of yourself? [interview] Every time Ryan finally manages to do something right, the whole world has to drop everything so we can all celebrate his "major achievement."

You know what? You're a joy-vampire. You… [imitates blood-sucking] suck the joy right out of everything! If I had a time machine, I'd go back to our first date, and slap myself.