Hamton J. Pig quotes from Tiny Toons Looniversity

[after practical joke snakes explode from the wall] Did our wall just explode with practical joke snakes?

(stutters) That’s all folks!

[stuttering and sweating nervously while practicing his lines] F-f-first day on this g-g-glorious campus. Oh no! T-that's not right! [starts crying]

I don't know how to be funny! [he starts bawling his eyes out, much to the students' surprise, and his gushers of tears flood the whole auditorium. Once the pool of tears drain out, Hamton finally stops crying and calms down, wiping his eyes]

Bugs Bunny

[clapping] Bravo, bravo! This is how you do it! Reach into the depths of your deepest fears to find the best gag!

Sweetie Bird

Tens, tens, tens across the board!

Buster Bunny

Nice going, buddy!

[singing] Twins as close as can be. Babs and Buster Bunny.

The duck whose star shines so bright. I won’t let Buster steal my spotlight.

Sweetie Bird

I'm full of anger and glee.

And sweet as pie, you can see.

And in all my years as the Dean, this is the weirdest class I’ve ever seen.

Please let us explain, Toons!

Babs Bunny

Watch when I pull this lever....

Anvils fall from the sky!

Why!

Our jokes are so very clever, capulting us while we fly!

Tongue-tied!

Stretchy arms and legs are fantastic!

Our eyes pop out of our face!

Face!

My emotions turn quite drastic when I get hit with a safe! Ouch!

We’re looney, we’re tiny, we’re looney, we're tiny toons!

I just got a call from the dean of Aqua Loo. Did you launch their school into a giant pie?

Buster Bunny

Yeah. We won the Prank War.

But Prank War is next month.

Babs Bunny

What?! That can't be right!

What about these flyers saying it's this month?

Now, if the Dean of Acme Loo and the Dean of Aqua Lou both know when Prank Week starts, why would someone need to announce it?

Buster Bunny

So, these flyers are a… PRANK?!?!

But then who made them?! [Scene goes to a room, revealing that Dizzy is the one who made the fake flyers]

Dizzy Devil

Dizzy prank everyone! Oh, got them so good! Not even my birthday!

Sweetie Bird

Aw, yeah! That big city air! I love the smell of hot garbage in the morning!

Do you hear that? It's the pulse of the city. And it's going… Plucky. Plucky. Plucky.

Babs Bunny

Say, cheese!

Sweetie Bird

Great shot.

Buster Bunny

This is the first time Babs and I have been to the big city!

Babs Bunny

I can't wait to capture everything! Smile!

Ooh! My turn! Get my good side. I mean, they're all technically my good side. Better find some light that does my classic good looks just it. There it is.

Buster Bunny

We better hustle up. I don't want to miss one minute of the Bugs Bunny retrospecter! SOLD OUT?!?!?!

The best to Acme Loo won't be back in four more hours and our plans just got ruined! Okay. I can handle this.

Never would have happened if I was in charge. Oh. That's a fantastic name for my one duck show.

Sweetie Bird

We're not wasting a beautiful day in the city! Let the Street-Bird show you around.

Are you sure it's safe?

Sweetie Bird

"Is it safe"? Absolutely.

Tweet-Tweet, Beautiful!

Sweetie Bird

[angrily glares at the Construction Pigeon] SHUT YOUR BEAK, YOU FLYING GARBAGE!!!

Hey, hey! Easy, easy! Was just saying a friendly hello!

Sweetie Bird

Aw, yeah?! You say "hello" to your mother with that mouth?!

Yeah...

Sweetie Bird

Heh. [snaps her fingers] See? I know how to handle the city. Just gotta look out for the creeps.