Cruz (as she is put in jail): You can't put me in there.
CCop
Captain Finney's orders.
If they both had their stories straight, the investigation was closed. Then what changed?
(Finney walks in)
Yeah, I wonder.
What?
Rat Junior shows up here and a month later one of us is behind bars. Nah, I'm sure that's just a coincidence.
I need to call my lawyer and tell her that I'm not gonna be coming back.
ICIAB Cop
Look, we're talking about murder, okay? We're talking 25 to life. You better hope that having to postpone your little family court case is the biggest problem you have at the end of this day.
So, Lieu, what do you know about the new guy?
He needs to buy a vowel for his last name.
Carlos (about Stu): I know him.
You do?
Well, I don't know him, I know of him. Interdepartmental basketball. He's their center. This is great.
Not for me. I was gonna play center.
It's great because it means he's ugly.
What are you talking about?
Well, excuse me, but some of us are sick and tired of the parade of Joe Hunky Fire Dudes who show up just long enough to get all the women all worked up then slither off into the sunset.
DDK
As opposed to someone who just bothers 'em and won't go away.
Prisoner (to Cruz): Wherever I've seen you, I didn't like you
PGPrison Guard
Cruz! Cruz! Come on, come on.
Speak up, I think a few people in Guam didn't hear you.
PGPrison Guard
I need a next of kin.
I don't have one.
PGPrison Guard
Cousin? Aunt?
I understand the concept. I don't have one.
Prisoner: If it wasn't her brother, it was somebody else's.
Cruz: Oh, that's brilliant.
Prisoner: Are you calling me stupid?
Cruz: No. Pissing off a cop who's gonna be out of here by five o'clock is... is genius.
Prisoner: Well, at least I know how to do some math, bitch. There's a whole bunch of us and one of you.
Cruz: Fine. I'm scared. I'm gonna be over in the corner trembling, bitch.
Kathy: I'm fine, so… never mind.
Carlos: Well, there's paperwork for "never mind" so you might as well just let us in.
Kathy: I guess I wanted to, you know, see what it was like to do drugs. So I took a bunch of pills then I instantly regretted it, but it was too late. I called you guys because I didn't know how long I had and I hate those stories when the neighbors call the police because they smell a bad odor. So if I died, I wanted to make sure somebody found me right away.
Carlos (to Kathy): So, um, let me get this straight. You thought that you were gonna die from eating too many antacid tablets?
Kathy: That won't kill me?
Carlos: Maybe if you're eating them when you're walking out into traffic...
Levine: Carlos.
Carlos: ...or something. Um, actually, you shouldn't exceed the recommended dose of any medication unless you first consult your physician.
Kathy: Even if I'm just taking them to get high?
Carlos: Especially then. Yeah, you shouldn't abuse medicine for any reason, ever.
Levine (about Carlos): She's obviously suicidal.
Carlos: Oh, come on. If she wanted to kill herself all she had to do was go...
Levine: Would you keep your voice down? She doesn't need instructions.
Carlos: I am not gonna spend the rest of the day at Bellevue because some wack job tried to get high on Rolaids. I'm not.
Rivers (to the judge about Cruz): Your Honor, my client has been a member of the NYPD for ten years. She hasn't missed a day of work except when injured in the line of duty. She's not exactly a flight risk.
Ross: To the contrary, Your Honor. The defendant has a list of civilian complaints lodged against her the size of the Manhattan yellow pages, and she's been the subject of three Internal Affairs investigations. Additionally, she has no living relatives or any other ties to the community. If she has a brain cell, she already has a plane ticket in her pocket.
Rivers: That's blatantly and demonstrably false, Your Honor.
Judge Stark: That she has a brain cell or a plane ticket? Sergeant Cruz, do you, or do you not have ties to the community?
Cruz: Depends on your definition.
Judge Stark: What happened to your face?
Cruz: I… tripped over my ties to the community.
Judge Stark: In the meantime, the defendant will be held at the Riker's Island detention center.
Cruz: You can't be serious.
Judge Stark: Next case.
Rivers: Your Honor, permission to approach?
Judge Stark: Next case, as in the one after this one.
Cruz: That's a death sentence and you know it.
Judge Stark: A death sentence without a trial? Who would do a thing like that? I'm a big fan of due process.
Levine: Carlos, the woman ate a bunch of pills and now there's a gas leak in her building. Do you see?
Carlos: I see you're hell-bent on ruining this day.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Third Watch pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.