Can I just say, before you start, that all my hopes for this competition - indeed, all my hopes that after 10 years there is one shred of talent or sanity in this village are resting entirely upon you?
No... No-no, no-no, no worries. I was trying to work out which bit of the nativity story was never done.
Good.
Then I realised... the actual birth.
Bad. And so it goes?
(Bangs head down on the table extreme force)
I rather like that.
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