(The situation looks bleak for Malcolm, UNTIL...Ollie introduces him to Julie. Malcolm is genuinely warm and empathetic towards her.)
(to Malcolm) Uh, look, um, this is Julie Price. She is, uh, the People's Champion that Nicola is announcing in her speech.
(to Julie) Julie Price...I'm so sorry for your loss. Hey, you're being looked after well enough, yeah?
Yeah, not bad.
You stick with Ollie. He's...yeah, he's a good guy. I know he looks a bit like an anorexic Leo Sayer there. Listen, could I have a photograph taken with you?
Who, me?
Yeah. I've got a little correction of memories, you know. Mandela and stuff. (to Ollie) Ollie, would you be so kind as to do the honor, good sir?
(Ollie takes a picture of Malcolm and Julie together.)
(to Malcolm, happily) You're a stunner, ye.
No, no, you're a stunner. You really are. Very impressive. You know, I'm not the only one who finds you impressive. The PM...he finds you very impressive.
That's good.
Well, great.
I think that there is a point in his speech today...
Mmm?
...where he would be very honored to introduce you. Is that something that would interest you?
Yeah.
Yes, it might clash, though, with, uh, with Nicola's championing of Julie's cause.
Oh, God. Look, the nerves are getting to us. I need to use your bog.
(Poor Julie has to go to the bathroom...)
Yeah, that's the ladies there.
(Ollie doesn't like what Malcolm's doing.)
Malcolm, you can't...You can't do that. She's our bonus track. She's our DVD Easter egg. We need her for the speech.
Boo-fucking-hoo. Can do and have done.
Yes, but that...What, in two hours, two hours, think of a whole new speech?
Oh, welcome to the Men's Room! Jesus Christ, listen. It's this simple, right? If she goes on with Nicola, she'll be watched by 15 housebound mouth-breathers. Oh, and by the ever-swelling ranks of the unemployed, who fucking hate us, by the way. But if she goes on with Tom, she'll make the 10 o'clock news, right?
(Julie has finally returned, AND...)
Julie, hi. Feel better?
Yeah, good.
Yes. Now what's it gonna be, Julie darling? Do you want to go with the teas maid...or with the caravan?
(excited) I'm going with the caravan. That is the Prime Minister?
That is the Prime Minister, yes.
(to Ollie) Sorry, Ollie. It's nice to meet you.
Julie, this way, come on. Are you actually in the hotel, or are you staying...
(As Malcolm and Julie leave together, Ollie runs back to Glenn's room to alert Glenn and Nicola of the bad news.)
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