Nicola and Ollie in “Series 3, Episode 3”

Nicola

OK, right, what have we got on the workplace gym reward scheme?

Ollie

Er, fighting obesity is one of the biggest challenges we face, sleepwalking into a crisis, ticking time bomb –

Nicola

You write almost entirely in generic meaningless buzzwords, don't you?

Ollie

I could take it more street, if you prefer – 'You is all proper bloaters and it is well gay, biatch' – but, you know, this is the language –

Nicola

No, but, you know – I just don't want to come across all nanny-state and sort of – 'Death by Chocolate is not a funny name for a pudding, it's a real and genuine concern', you know, I don't want to give the press another opportunity to see me as Mrs. Sour Power Vinegar Tits sucking on a lemon.

Ollie

Fine, I understand, so we'll sugar-coat it.

Nicola

Well, leaven it, ideally, with a couple of jokes.

Ollie

Yeah, all right, no problemo.

Ollie

Now-Now? Jokes now?

Nicola

Yeah.

Ollie

OK, how about: 'We want people to be fit, not fit to burst'?

Nicola

I'm gonna have to go down the slapstick route, aren't I? Do the speech straight, but dressed as Freddie Starr's Hitler.