TV QuotesDatabase
S7

The Simpsons · Season 7

Bart and Krusty in “Bart the Fink”

[Krusty is sitting on the curb smoking a cigarette and drinking from a bottle in a paper bag. His home and belongings have just all been auctioned off. Bart approaches.]

Krusty? Hi. Is it okay if I sit down here?

Go ahead, kid, knock yourself out.

[sits] I'm sorry for all the trouble I've caused you, Krusty. But you know, my mom says God never closes a door without opening a window.

Well, no offense kid, but your mom's a dingbat. There's no silver lining here. I was a big cheese. A HUGE CHEESE! But now look at me! I gotta ride the bus like a schnook. I gotta live in an apartment like an idiot. I gotta wait in line with nobodies to buy groceries from a FAILURE!

It doesn't matter how you live or what you did wrong. As long as you're on TV, people will respect you.

Respect? BAH! What good is respect without the moolah to back it up? Everywhere I go I see teachers in Ferraris. Research scientists drinking champagne! I tried to drink a Coke on the bus, and they took away my pass! That's no life for a famous clown...

Well, if it'll make you feel any better, Krusty, you can punch me in the face.

[Bart cringes as Krusty angrily cocks his fist back. For a second it looks as though he'll do it, but he changes his mind.]

Nah, forget it. Go home, kid.

More from this episode

All quotes from this episode →

More The Simpsons quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Simpsons pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.