[A V1-empowered Homelander sits in President Calhoun's chair in the Oval Office. He hears a knock at the door.]
Come in! [in a cheerful tone as Ashley and Calhoun enter] Hello, you two. Isn't it a beautiful day?
[nervously] You're welcome to use this office as long as you need.
I know. Let's get right to it! While Oh Father is hard at work on my divine unveiling, I have a few action items I need you to handle.
Of course. Anything, sir.
The Democratic Church of America is to be the official national religion, based around the one true god: Me.
Great idea.
I want every boundary between church and state dissolved. I want troops sent into every sanctuary city that took in Starlighters. Issue an executive order banning abortion. Also, breastfeeding is now mandatory. Babies need their mothers, not fake milk. Actually, outlaw that, too.
Sir?
[intensely] Ban nut milk. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was making you think nuts were milk. [snickers after a short silence]
Those are all, uh, fantastic ideas, sir. Um... I'll run them by Congress–
No, disband it.
Sorry?
Disband Congress. It's better for freedom.
Well, sir, I don't really have that authority.
[frowns] Ashley, do me a favor. Read Steven's mind. I wanna know if he's a true believer.
But of... course I am, sir.
Terrific! Then you have nothing to worry about. [gets up and steps over to Ashley] Do it.
[He rips off her wig, and she gasps and covers her face in shame as "Back Ashley" is revealed]
[revolted] What the fuck is that?
Don't look!
Don't make me ask again.
[stammering in fear] Sir, I–I... Sir, I...
[sighs; steels herself and turns back to Homelander] He's terrified of you, sir. He thinks you're just a tiny bit psychotic.
Steven! [steps towards Calhoun, glaring intensely] Here I am. A living god. [rests his hands on Calhoun's shoulders] Right before your eyes... and still, your faith wavers? [beat; Calhoun is clearly too terrified to answer] It's okay. No, I'm not angry... [clasps his head gently] But I am disappointed.
[He crushes Calhoun's head into a pulp, then wipes the blood off his hands on a sofa. An utterly terrified Ashley stares at Calhoun's body as Homelander sits back down.]
More from this episode
All quotes from this episode →More The Boys quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Boys pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.