Sheldon and Leonard in “The White Asparagus Triangulation”

[knock-knock-knock] Leonard! [knock-knock-knock] Leonard! [knock-knock-knock] Leonard!

What Sheldon? What Sheldon? What Sheldon?

Tell me what you see here. [points to his laptop screen]

The blunt instrument that will be the focus of my murder trial?

This is Stephanie's Facebook page. Now where it should say "in a relationship", what does it say?

Stephanie Barnett is single.

Furthermore, earlier this evening, she threw a digital sheep at some guy named Mike. Who's Mike? Why does he get a digital sheep and not you?

It's just her Facebook page! And we've only been going out a couple of weeks.

You don't see it, do you? We're losing her.

OK, I'm going to make this very simple for you. You…are not in this relationship. I…am! Ergo, you have noooo say in anything that happens between me and Stephanie.

I'm afraid I can't allow that. Pursuant to Starfleet General Order 104, Section A, you are deemed unfit, and I hereby relieve you of your command.

General Order 104, Section A does not apply in this situation.

Give me one good reason why not.

Because this is not Star Trek!