The Apprentice · Season 1
Claude, perhaps you'd let me know about Versatile?
Claude Littner: Their total sales amounted to £467.50, their costs were £267.21, yielding a profit of £200.29.
Lord Sugar: Okay. Karren, same thing for Connexus.
Karren Brady: Sales: £343.53, Costs: £341.66 (celebratory signs from Mergim, Gary and Charleine) making a pathetic profit of only £1.87.
I think I'll have to go down, and lie down for a while and put a cold towel on my head! Selina has displayed absolutely no leadership whatsoever! I think we're in trouble with this lot.
(while ironing a tie) Winning!
(when Connexus return to the boardroom) Well, to come in with £1.87, it's abysmal! Late in the kitchen, late at the location, lunch time; you turn up at 1:30, you may as well forget it!
(holding a spring onion) Is this an onion?
Sam Curry: Yes, that's an onion.
(After Versatile try to sell fish to a vegan restaurant) I must be losing the plot here. This place is teaming with people and they've gone into a veggie restaurant trying to sell fish? That's no way to sell.
(to Joseph Valente whose role model is Hugh Hefner) If my boyfriend said he wanted to be like Hugh Hefner, I would kick him where it would really hurt!
I just want to say, if anyone is not productive on this task and we lose, they'll be coming back into the boardroom with me. I don't care!
(on Team Connexus' digital billboard) You're rotating like a kebab, Ruth.
(after Lord Sugar moves the teams back to girls vs. boys) I'm glad we got rid of Brett 'cause he's bald.
(during a brainstorm) What about Manly Moist?
Sam Curry: (giving a disgusted look at the representation) Ugh!
(Assisting Brett collecting the manure) The smell is beautiful.
(to the losing team) In the task, you got covered in bullshit. Now you know how I feel, when I listen to some of the rubbish that comes out in the boardroom.
(on Connexus' third appearance in the boardroom) Okay, let me tell you this. Normally, I set this task at eight o'clock in the morning and I tell people to be back here 6 o'clock the same day. You had the whole of overnight and all that time to think about where you were going and what you were doing. Not organized!
I just don't like questions that'll make no sense.
Selina Waterman-Smith: You're right, I shouldn't bring up anything I have an opinion on.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Apprentice pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
