Korvo quotes from Solar Opposites

As team leader, I should be included in all things, which is why I demand that we all be invited to this dinnering party!

Terry

No, I-I can't add a plus one so late in the date, let alone a plus two!

Then I will activate the Earth Eraser, and we can all get turned into dust! [does so]

All matter will be atomized in five, four...

Terry

Okay! Jesus fucking Christ, I added you to the RSBP. You've sufficiently cramped my style.

[stops the device's countdown] Good. We shall leave in an hour. I need to apply darker blue makeup to... everywhere under my robe.

Terry

Man, we gotta throw out that Earth Eraser.

Try and die, bitch!

Red Goobler? Wait a hot fucking second, I thought you killed the Red Goobler last year! After he hunted us in the Halloween store! R-Remember that whole thing?!

Terry

Yeah, I lied about killing him. He got away, and I kinda just thought maybe he'd disappear, like that eye that used to be on my back. [turns and lifts his shirt, revealing the eye]

Dammit, Terry! That eye is still there, and so is the Red Goobler.

Terry

Hey, what the fuck? Why's he so big? Last time we saw him, he was about the size of a softball, or, like, a fat baseball.

I don't know, Terry. He probably grows when I'm stressed out. Or maybe he eats a lot. Stop trying to poke holes!

Terry

Well, sorry for trying to be consistent!

I guess we're in a "There can be only one" Highlander type situation.

Jesse

Wait, I thought that show was about a hot nurse who goes back in time to get her ass eaten out!

No, that's Outlander!

Aisha, I need that magic potion.

Aisha

The one we keep in Narnia? We promised we would never go back!

Remember when we all went and saw Ready Player One?

Yumyulack

No. But I wipe my mind after seeing any movie where people don't steal the Declaration of Independence.

There was one scene in Ready Player One where that computer kid went inside The Shining.

Yumyulack

Wait, they just put a better movie inside their movie?

Terry

Aaaargh, I wish I'd never made us watch stupid Jingle All the Way! I should have picked a regular Christmas movie, like Die Hard or Gremlins or Piranha 3D!

Shut the fuck up, Terry. We'd be in the exact same situation. Those aren't Christmas movies!

Terry

They are too! Any movie that takes place on Christmas is a Christmas movie now! I guess Piranha 3D doesn't...

Dammit, how did the Pupa get his Harry Potter whistle again?! Terry, I thought you locked it up in the childproof cabinets where we keep the poison darts!

Terry

I did, I did, I put it behind the poison darts!

Jesse

That song is so annoying! Stop it, Pupa!

Terry

You didn't do anything for the Christmas stuff with this, Pupa, you're bad!

Yumyulack

How does he keep getting that thing?! Is he, like, out getting help?! Who would do that?! He can't even complete a full sentence!

[stops playing the whistle after Terry, Korvo, Jesse, and Yumyulack leave the room] Merry Christmas, everyone!

Jesse

Oh no! Terry's arms formed a rat king and they sided with Gladwell!

How did you gather that so fast?

Jesse

Because I'm young and adulthood hasn't atrophied my imagination!

Yumyulack

Damn, you look thicc, Pupa. What's the deal?

He gets all backed up with the stuff he eats off the ground. Terry's supposed to clean him out, but he hates doing it.

Don't let him hear it's time, or he'll hide in the crawlspace under the house.

Terry

[muffled] Ow!

Jesse

We could do it! Decluttering stuff is a passion of mine, like pottery or Korean hentai.

Great, it's all yours. See if Terry's retainer is in there - his teeth are starting to look like Justin drew them himself.

Terry

Grab my hand, like they did in True Lies!

Why wouldn't you say "Like in Cliffhanger"?! You know I love that movie!

Terry

Yeah, but I don't! John Lithgow as the villain?! No thank you!

This is stupid! How are we still in the same goddamn line from last episode?!

Terry

Ah, this could take forever. That's part of why it's so great!

Jesse

Have we moved at all?

Yumyulack

Not me. But I try to limit my movements each day so I can save energy, in case I run into Tim Burton - so I can punch him in the face for plagiarizing my whole tone!

The Solar Opposites are going to Hululand!

It's not gonna be like that "Itchy & Scratchy Land" episode of The Simpsons, just to be clear right up front.

Terry

We'll see about that!

Terry is special, and he went to a school for special kids.

Okay, but I thought we couldn't call them "special" anymore because of Antifa.

You know, it's moments like this, moments of crisis, when you find out who you really are and where you belong.

Wow, Sylvester Stallone, I... never thought of it that way.

I learned that from Dolly Parton on the set of Rhinestone, when a grip was choking on an egg roll. I froze up. But Dolly didn't. She saved that fat man's life. That was the moment I realized she was the star, and I was not... gonna get a look at those massive hooters.

Yumyulack

[grinning] Whoa, their sun went nova?! How do we make ours do that?!

Aisha

You just have to find an isotope of--

DON'T TELL HIM! That's three dead teams in a row.

Aisha

So?

Isn't that, like, totes random?

Aisha

Space is fսcking dangerous.

Yumyulack

[still grinning] Hell yeah, it is! Tell us about more dead teams!

Terry

But skip the backstories. I don't wanna get emotionally invested if they're all gonna get Mufasa-ed.