Dr. Cox, Elliot and others in “Unfinished Business”

A tip jar. Really? So what am I supposed to do, just duke you my change because you poured hot water through beans? Well, I'll tell you what, my friend, unless you're also planning on giving me a complimentary reach-around with my beverage, I'm afraid the answer is yeah-no. Here's a novel idea: Why don't you go fetch me a very large cup of coffee with so damn many fake sugars in it that the coffee itself gets cancer. [slouches away]

Elliot

Guys, guys, I got a good one. Is it me, or does...

[monotone] ...someone need to switch to decaf?

Turk

Lay off of Elliot. She doesn't watch as much old TV as we do.

Elliot

You actually stood up for me! But, now I'm forced to ask...

[monotone again] ...who are you and what have you done with Turk?

Elliot

[shrieking] Stop finishing my awesome jokes!

J.D.

[holding his ears] Oh my God!