Malcolm, Steve and others in “Who Killed Bambi?”

Steve!

Hello!

Oh! This... is far too fucking fast. Malcolm!

Well, all hail, my slinky southern six-shooters!

[Chuckles] Nice of you to finally turn up.

Not nice, actually.

Apologies, my Texan "Terribles", but I have been very busy attending to some important Sex Pistol business down in Los Angeles.

Well, oh, fearless fuck-up, I've been attending to some very important near-death business involving thousands of redneck cowboys baying for my blood.

We were all attending to that, all of us. Stop saying "me".

But I cop it the most because I'm the star. You hear that, Cookie? Me and you may as well piss off and finally go have some fun.

Oh, yeah, sounds good. When are we leaving?

Go! Won't be hardfinding another backing band.

[Chuckles] "Backing band". It's only me and John anyone actually looks at.

Thank fucking Christ they're not listening to you.

Doesn't matter what you sound like, it's what you look like what counts.

Yeah, fuck off, you little junkie.

Who you telling to fuck off?

You!

Brilliant! [Laughs] Exactly as I planned! You were turning into a rock band, and how can any poor, disenfranchised kid relate to a rock band? Inaccessible. Famous. John was acting like Rod Stewart!

To be fair, he's got the hair for it now.

Fuck off!

I needed to bring you back down to street-level where you belong, to throw you into the furnace and see what remains of you.

You are completely insane!

That is why I insisted that we only play the southern states. It is a shame about this place, though.

Why? This is the first proper venue we've had.

Warner wanted you to play all the big cities, but I told them, "They're not a rock band."

Then what the fuck are we?

Well... You are very soon to be... sexy Latin assassins.

Dom Perignon.

You what? I have been in L.A. gathering funding for our new movie. "The Great Rock 'n' Roll Swindle". I've already recorded a track for it, and after this, we're gonna fly down to Rio. The Great Train Robber, Ronnie Biggs, is gonna be a guest vocalist on a Pistols track.

The fuck he is!

Ugh! It'll be fun. Come on, that whole outlaw spirit! And plus, girls don't wear many clothes down Rio way.

Sounds good.

Yeah, I'm game.

You fucking cunt! [Lunges at Malcolm]

Oi! [Repeatedly] Ah...! Hey! You calm down, Shirley Temple. [Chuckles]

[Spits on floor and walks away] Come on, Sidney. Sid!

Don't go running off with that miserable ponce! Come on, let's have some fun, eh?

I fucking hate you for what you did to Nancy. Never forget that.

Oi, what... What about soundcheck?

Oh, just fuck off! Who wants a drink?