I can't decide this. I don't know how. How do I choose? I mean, one of them I haven't met and the other I'm just starting to know, but I love 'em both. I love 'em both.
S5 E5The Baby
Having a baby right now is gonna ruin my life. Forget having the time to figure out who I am or what I want. I'll never have the chance. Hannah has this baby and I am stuck being the person I am right this second. No college. No job. No clue. And that is not somebody ready to raise a kid.
S5 E6Forgive and/or Forget
Oh God. I'm such a waste of oxygen and nutrients and tuition.
[to Charlie] I'm not a mother. Why did you call this baby Diana? Because that was your mother's name. And why was she your mother? Because she squeezed you out? No, it's because she loved you and because she wanted you. Because she stuck around your whole damn life and she bathed you and dressed you and raised you. And that is not me. It's just not. Someday, maybe, but not today.
Hey look, O, it's the stooges.
OOwen
I like to watch with Charlie. He laughs at all the dumb parts with me.
Well, I can laugh at the dumb parts. I can.... Oh man, that's really dumb. But funny...
How can I relax with half the hospital down my shirt? Okay, I get more privacy twirling pasties at a shore leave party.
S5 E7Tender Age
If it were my child, if I had to look inside a dumpster for my child, I couldn't do it.... This is the kind of ordeal that makes me feel... it says to me I could never be a father.
I want you to know that if we were gonna have a baby, any way, at any time, then I would love that baby, and I would protect it and I would want it. I would, no matter what.
Thank God that isn't Owen.
It's somebody's Owen, right?
It's easy. It's stuffed and everything. Oven on, insert bird.
What's the rule, Owen? If we're in a big place like the mall, and you turn around and you don't see me, you stay put. Or you tell a policeman, you don't go off looking for me, that's how kids get lost.
OOwen
I wasn't lost.
S5 E8Love and War
My parents had five kids.
Are you just realizing that now?
Five. How did they manage that?
They had sex a lot?
You get a 6-minute credit. Which, actually, when you figure in my 15 minute credit from, you know, handling the spitup on your shift, that works out to be a 9-minute credit in my favor.
You claim you can't balance a checkbook.
Afterwards what do you say we go pick up a few chicks? Get matching tattoos.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Party of Five pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.