[watching Piper climb up her bunk] Need a little help there?
Nope. I've got it, thank you. I called you my girlfriend.
What? To who?
To my parents, and my brother, and my brother's wife.
[lets out a long exhale] That's a bold move, Chapman.
I know. I didn't even mean to say it, but it just... It just came out. And now... Now I can't stop thinking about it.
[sarcastically] Do you wanna pass me a note and have me circle yes or no?
[embarrassed] I'm not asking you to be my girlfriend...
Oh no?
No, definitely not! I just thought... I thought that it was weird.
Totally weird. [pauses] You know, the Quran is turning out to be more interesting than I would've guessed. Technically, I'm not supposed to be touching it, but I did wash my hands. So, I decided that Allah would be cool with it.
Will you be my girlfriend?
[bursts out laughing] Yeah.
Yes!?
Yes, you idiot!
[to the rest of the cell] She said yes.
[cut to reveal that only Anita and Sister Jane are in the cell, looking obviously disinterested]
Good for you, hun.
Mazel tov.
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