Kevin quotes from O'Grady

Kevin

Look what you did, Abby. This string was the last straw... that you broke... which was the last... straw. You know what I mean!

Kevin

Alright, Harold, your first phone number. You should get this framed.

Harold

Already had it photocopied.

Kevin

See anyone look up?

Abby

No, did you?

Kevin

No, truce?

Abby

Truce.

Kevin

I call roof.

Abby

I call fire escape. Roof's that way.

Kevin

Fire escape's that way. I got the fire escape!

Abby

I got the roof!

Kevin

See ya tomorrow!

Abby

Good luck!

Abby

Kevin, what are you doing?!

Kevin

I'm eating!

Abby

Off the floor?!

Kevin

What? It's not dirty unless it stays there for like an hour (eats food from the floor)

Abby

Kevin, you are so disgusting!

Kevin

Mmmm, turkey!

Abby

They don't even serve turkey here!

Kevin

They don't?

Abby

No, spit it out!

Kevin

Okay, (spits into his hand)

Abby

Eww, not in front of me!

Kevin

Okay, I'll just put it back into my mouth (puts it back into his mouth)

Abby

Eww!

Kevin

That's good turkey!

Wow, Kevin! How do you get the street signs to obey you? Show me your mastery!

Kevin

Well, Dr. Myers, you just ask them.

Is that all?

Kevin

Yeah, well, they're public service signs, they're here to help.

Who else beside Harold is your friend?

Kevin

I got lots of friends!

Like who? Your dolls?

Kevin

[pops bubble] Shut up!

[laughs] You still play with dolls!

Kevin

[swats bubble away] No I don't! Those are action figures!

Yeah, whatever man.

Kevin

Hey, Abby, can I borrow your cell phone?

Abby

Who are you calling?

Kevin

Pizza place.

Abby

But we're in the pizza place.

Kevin

Yeah, I'd like a pizza for delivery. Abby, do you want anything?

Abby

I'll have mushrooms on it but wh-

Kevin

I'll have one half mushroom, half plain

Abby

Wait, you're using my minutes because you're too lazy to get up and walk to the counter?

Kevin

Yeah. Oh, I'm over at the booth in the corner, I'm waving my hand.

Abby

I want a soda.

Kevin

Okay, bye. [hangs up]

Abby

Kevin, I wanted a soda.

Kevin

Abby, the counter's right there, just get up and get it.

Kevin

[about secluded location] Perfect place just to hang out!

Harold

Or make out.

Abby

Don't even think about it.

Kevin

Oh please.

Harold

Alright, just sayin'.

Kevin

I am not making out with Abby.

Abby

Ew! I would make out with Harold before I'd make out with Kevin!

Kevin

I would make out with Harold before I would make out with Abby!

How come no one wants to make out with me?

Abby

Whatever, none of us are making out!

Harold

This is uncomfortable sexual tension happening in this van..

Kevin

So how's she taking it?

Abby

Um, yeah pretty well. I just wouldn't mention S-P-I-N-A-C-H.

Kevin

Spine ache?

Abby

Spinach!

Aaah!

Abby

You're a lifeguard?

Kevin

Yea!

Abby

At this pool?

Kevin

Oh yeah, all summer long, baby!

Abby

Huh.

Kevin

What?

Abby

Oh, I was just wondering how this sounds; Welcome To Captain Frogurts, I'm so sorry for your lost.

Kevin

Oh you heard about that kid this morning?