If I'm going to do this one woman thing, it can't be with just one woman.
S1 E7Cliff Mantegna
S1 E8Cara Fitzgerald
PPatient
[in examination] Dr. Troy, you are the only man I want handling my penis.
You are the only man who's ever said that to me.
PPatient
Is the scar really gone? My fiance doesn't like going down.
And you're gonna marry that bitch?
PPatient
Just don't tell my girlfriend.
[Both men laugh]
PPatient
So the cream will help it all go away in two weeks?
Or your money back.
[upon learning that Sean made a pass at Dr. Grace Santiago] Did you hire her because you're afraid that she might sue?
GSDr. Grace Santiago
Lawsuits typically happen when you lose your job after you have slept with the boss.
Is that a threat?
[to Christian] Wait... you slept with Grace?
[rolls his eyes]
Goddamn it! Are you out of your mind? How could you do this!
Sleep with someone who rejected you?
I don't like her, Sean. She is a troublemaker and her shoes are cheap.
Shut up, Christian, just shut up. I need to think.
This is about you playing Demi Moore with some 25-year-old punk kid with an overactive libido.
The one with an overactive libido is a middle-aged surgeon. You fired him for revenge. [Edit] Someone else wants me and you can't stand it.
Please, I can have anyone anytime I want it.
You can't have me.
Julia, your boy toy is me.
15 years younger.
I've lost my faith, Father. I've drank, I've done drugs, I've fornicated with women and discarded them like trash. I've lost my soul. The boys you raped will be saying the same thing in 20 years.
S1 E9Sophia Lopez II
MBMerrill Bobolit
[referring to Kimber Henry as his ideal wife] My DNA mixed with hers all but assures a blond Jew.
What do you think that would be like? To want to get rid of your penis? The hub of all power?
Actually, I admire her conviction. It takes...
Balls?
I have a tattoo on my right breast. Two female symbols intertwined.
Double dykes?
I'm expressing my lesbian identity.
What about you? Are you gay?
Today.
And tomorrow?
Straight......after the surgery.
You're a conundrum wrapped up in a riddle, babe. (Edit)
Have you always been a lesbian, Liz?
I slept with a man once in college. He had long hair and when I closed my eyes, and felt it sweeping across my face, I pretended it was Joni Mitchell.
S1 E10Adelle Coffin
I don't excel at anything. My relationships, my profession... All I have to offer is a great smile and a convincing line of bullshit.
[referring to the cadaver] Sean, we've got to switch heads.
No, we're not. [Edit] Practice makes perfect.
Practice on what? Mr. Potato Head? There is only one way. Kill Ms. Grubman and practice on her.
What did she give you that I couldn't?
She saw the good in me, Julia. She saw the potential, the hope. Every time you look at me I see it in your eyes. All I see staring back at me is regret.
S1 E11Montana/Sassy/Justice
Excuse me, someone in the lobby requests to see an arrogant, oversexed, antichrist.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Nip/Tuck pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.