[Martin desperately tries to disable the ship's computers by beating it with his pistol.]
Hey, there's bullets in the other end of that thing!
S6The Creeping Terror
CCrow
[while the crew indulges in a coffee shop setting scenario, trying to avoid coming off as pretentious] It's definitely not working. ... [in a snobby tone] I've been recording my life in pastel!
The only question worth asking is "What am I going through right now?".
[as a in-house guitarist, towards Mike] You- the white male- are my personal oppressor. Oh my!
CCrow
Yes, she is so great! I saw her one-woman show; her soul cried out to me.
So I'll take my rage, and box it up, and take it out with the trash!
Thanks a lot, Dr. Forrester; see what you've done? You turned my friends into a bunch of self-absorbed poseurs!
A white male middle-class power holder would say that, Mike!
[Frank and Dr. Forrester are doing laundry in Deep 13]
I'll show you some real Creeping Terrors... these grass stains!
[while he and Mike stage a parody vignette of "Love, American Style", holding a wedding ring] Well, I'm finally going to propose to Debbie!
That's great; let's see the ring. [puts it on his finger, and it gets stuck] The ring's stuck!
I guess we'll have to get married! [chuckles as he and Mike kiss]
[Servo has appeared to have Gypsy devour him, and Crow is halfway inside her mouth]
CCrow
Here I come, Tommy!
Okay, buddy. Slide right down!
Crow! What in the world are you doing?! [Mike pulls Crow out of Gypsy's mouth]
CCrow
Hey, hey! Whoa, Whoa, Whoa! OW! Right on my hip!
Come on up here!
Thanks, Mike. I hope you don't think that was my idea.
No, I think I know whose idea it was. [peeks inside Gypsy's mouth] Hey, Tom!
Hey, Mike! See if you can get her to swallow you. It's really neat!
[embarrassed] Oh, This is so embarrassing... I don't look fat, do I?...
No, Gypsy. You don't look fat. You're a little lumpy, maybe, but not fat.
Oh, this is embarrassing...
Come on! Hop in and experience the alimentary canal in action. It's the ultimate trip!
Uh, no thanks. I think I'll pass. Anyway, we got letters to read here.
You know, Mike, I don't feel very well all of the sudden. I think I'm getting allergic to Tom...
CCrow
Join the club, Gypsy.
I think I'll go get a tissue... [slowly slithers away]
S6Bloodlust!
[The title appears on screen.]
CCrow
I thought I smelled something!
Is Velveeta a member of the National Dairy Council?
Naw, Velveeta's a splinter group.
CACrow [as Narrator]
Already the children have disturbed Uncle Jim. Uncle Jim is an edgy man who should not be riled.
George and Andy help Bill feed the pigs every day…
SAServo [as Narrator]
Day after life-sucking day.
[As grain pours out of a spout]
CACrow [as George]
I just saw a finger!
Can we go home?
[The kids are playing in the hay]
SAServo [as city girl]
But I have to be careful with my new jeans 'cause I just got them at Pamida!
[The girls wake up in their bunk bed and talk to each other.]
CACrow [as girl]
Uncle Jim's out of control - we frag him today.
Bloodlust! (movie)
[On the SOL bridge, Mike and the Bots are in costumes.]
Ah! Hello. Welcome to tonight's Mystery… Murder… Dinner… Party--
CCrow
I did it!
GSGypsy, Servo, Mike
CROW!
[Our helpless "heroes" are instructed to go to "The Tree Of Death" where they will find means to fight back Balleau. Cut to a tree with a jawless skull on it]
MAMike [as the skull]
[muffled and sarcastically] Oh, oh, REAL good plan! "Let's go to the Tree Of Death right away!"
[In Balleau's "gallery", one of his victims is kneeling with his hands extended]
MAMike [as Al Jolson]
[singing] Mammy! Mammy! I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Mystery Science Theater 3000 pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.