[The camera pans down to rest on the rears of three dancing women in tight pants.]
Mike: Holy cow! That's 40 pounds of butt in 30-pound-butt-capacity pants!

[The camera pans down, showing the "Selling Wizard's" lovely gams]
Crow: Boy, she's got a big scab on her knee.
Narrator: Gentlemen! If you please!
Mike [as Narrator]: You filthy degenerates!

[The camera pans onto a victim of the spider: a shriveled-up corpse completely drained of blood.]
Crow: It's Rose Kennedy!

[The camera pans over a shot of a snow-capped mountain range.]
Servo: Oh jeez, there's soccer teams laying all over the place!

[The camera pans slowly over a recent battlefield, the bodies being pecked by carrion birds]
Crow: Crows! My brethren! See what a grand and noble creature they are?
Servo: [doubtfully] Uh huh...

[The camera pans to several different chickens calling.]
Crow: This is a test of the Emergency Broadcast Chicken.
Servo: Man, Peter must be walkin' around denyin' everybody this morning.

[The camera pans very slowly down Maciste's body as he steers the raft]
Crow: Hmm... the camera operator is indulging himself here...

[The camera slowly pans across a thickly tree-screened home at night.]
Servo: Ee-gah...
Crow: Shtemlo.
Joel: Watch out for snakes!
Servo [as Announcer]: We've hidden Mitchell somewhere in this picture...
Crow [as Announcer]: Mitchell, will you stand up, please?

[The campers walk into the room to find that their friend has died. Molly solemnly leads them back out.]
Crow [as Molly]: Well, your breakfast is getting cold, and she's not getting any warmer.

[The cast chases each other round and round a table while ludicrous hootenanny music plays.]
Mike: Maybe they'll all turn into butter.

[The character of Mike Nelson has appeared for the first time, as a temp worker in Deep 13.]
Dr. Forrester: Here it is. Mitchell, starring Joe Don Baker
Mike Nelson: You guys watch Joe Don Baker movies?

[The chicken-men's spaceship, which looks rather chicken-ey itself, flies about, terrorizing the people in the street.]
Crow [as Phantom]: Set whole fryers to stun!
Mike: The upper half of a Hopper painting.
Servo [as Citizen]: Oh! A giant roast chicken!
Crow [as Citizen]: It is brown on the outside, tender and juicy on the inside!
Mike [as Citizen]: It is not fermented, pickled, or raw! Run!
Servo [as Citizen]: Ohhhhh!
Crow [as Phantom]: Potatoes or stuffing?!

[The children's family is discussing an exploration mission to space while eating dinner.]
Mother: The first cosmic exploration rocket will be launched from this base.
Crow: ...the dining room?

[The circus starts with a parade of all the performers.]
Servo: Supporters drummed up for the Spanish-American War.
Joel: Hey, uh, aren't the horses supposed to go behind the band?
Servo: Oops.
Crow: Now make way for the Ku Klux Klowns!
. . .
Joel: Oh, please you guys, you're getting too dark. Would you lighten up?
Servo: How about this? Hey, look, it's Rue McClanahan.
Joel: That's better.
Crow: It's Ezekiel, the Amish clown. [chuckles] No buttons.
Servo: Oh, look, it's Ice Princess Zebra.
[Emmett Kelly appears in the parade.]
Joel: Hey, it's Emmett Kelly.
Servo: That's good.
Joel: No, it really is.
Servo: Whatever, Joel.
. . .
[As the narrator mentions Emmett Kelly over a shot of him eating a sandwich]
Joel: See? Emmett changed management soon after this.
[Shot of the crowd cheering]
Crow [as crowd]: We love it when he eats!

[The Clippers gang approaches a house, only to have a gunshot hit the ground in front of them]
Crow: Oh, Austin City Limits!