Only God could explain why you stayed here with me, and your brothers and sisters didn't. It must have been all that praying I did during the pregnancy with you. Do you know I didn't even smoke? Imagine being that preoccupied that you forget to even light up a cigarette every once in a while. My stomach was tied in such knots, and...I was so steeped in all my prayers that I couldn't even force down a highball. I mean, if it wasn't for food, I would've wasted away to nothing; and of course, through everything that was going on through my mind, I never had time to horseback ride or go on a roller coaster. And that trampoline out back, that practically went to waste. With all that lack of exercise, it's a wonder you were ever born at all.
Clay, it's been a grand Puppington tradition that the head of the household passes down Ol' Gunny to his firstborn son. But I am not passing it onto you now because of that tradition. I am in fact ending the tradition. There will be no coming of the age hunting trip. I don't want this in my possession anymore. It's tainted. With blood.
