VVince (spoken)
I, Vincent Fox, ...am a c**t.
From Millwall to the Albert Dock, there's one thing plain to see,
In this entire borough there's no bastard bad as me.
I guess it ain't a huge surprise that I have got no friends,
Well it was you that had your stag do ethnically cleansed.
When I was a little cub my grandma said to me...
VSVince's grandmother (in a flashback)
Please, son, put the gun down, you can have all my money!
Silly cow, she kept her savings underneath the bed,
So I nicked her f**king pension book and shot her in the head!
CCat
He robbed me!
BDBeagle Dog
Knifed me!
BBulldog
Shot me!
CChihuahua
He poured acid down my front!
RRottweiler
He managed to castrate me even though the knife was blunt!
CChimpanzee
He took me to Oxford and abused me in a punt!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Mongrels pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.