Looks like it's just you and me. [Lupin jumps over the railing, does a somersault in the air and grabs the hook to swing to the other side of the hull] LUPIIIIN! Damn it all, get back here! You're under arrest!
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
Alright, I warned you, Mr. Zenigata. Now I'm afraid I'm going to have to insist that you leave the ship.
[as he is dragged away by security] No! Mr. Onabes! Please! Hey! I can explain! This is all her fault! I mean, his fault! You see, she's...
Amore!
What does that mean?
It means: "I want you, I must have you! Let me take you and start a family!"
[He tackles the flabbergasted Lupin]
I absolutely refuse to let you up, Miss Mary, unless you promise to marry me!
WHAT? That's impossible!
[Onabes forcefully kisses Lupin]
Damn it!
[He slaps Onabes, then flips him over in a judo grip]
Just snap out of it!
Oh yes, flip me like a hamburger, baby!
[Lupin covers his mouth and flees]
I'm not even a friggin' woman!
Oh well, nobody's perfect.
[Realizing he can't win, Lupin jumps down from the mast and lands on the deck. His makeup is now a mess]
[frazzled] All right! You win! I give up! But premarital sex is out of the question!
He's a guy, Lupin, and you're a guy! And if you were that kind of guy, well, you could have friggin' told somebody!
[as Zenigata] I do admit to sort of a perverse admiration.
Admiration, my ass! Why don't you just admit it?! You ARE in love with the guy! And you always have been, haven't you? You big egomaniac!
Friggin' birds can't get close to that thing, and I don't think I can pull off the backless look, either. I mean, not that it doesn't look absolutely stunning on you or anything, but it does take a certain androgynous quality, you know?
I swear, I'll beat you with your own hat. [Jigen laughs]
Man, sure could have used Goemon's Zantetsu sword this time, huh?
[Jigen sees a figure sitting on a crate]
Hmm?
I said, Goemon's sword would have come in handy!
[Jigen recognizes the figure as Zenigata]
Huh?
I know, it's a bummer, but it's no use crying over spilled milk. We just gotta...
Lupin! You'd better get up here!
What's the matter, Lupin? Don't tell me I've stumped ya! I don't think I can take the shock! [He laughs, then starts suffocating]
Yeah, that man's the last of a dying breed, Jigen.
You can say that again.
Kind of like u... ah... ah, ah, ah... [He sneezes]
Serves you right. I mean, uh, didn't your mama ever tell you not to go out without your pants on?
[Lupin sees he's only wearing his boxers]
Oh, man.
[They laugh]
[Zenigata is woken by the telephone and answers it]
Zenigata.
Hey, man. How's it hanging?
I was just...
I refer to that big wad of drool hanging from your chin, you slacker. Then again, in your dreams is the only place you'll ever catch me.
[sneezing] You know, I think the whole thing went pretty well.
[sneezing] And that was really the best plan you could think of?
Gotta keep your eye on the prize. After all, the whole idea was to divert his attention. Remember that. And that's what counts.
Because now, Zenigata's gonna be practically living on that boat until they recover our bodies.
Exactly. [He sneezes again]
[One of the money bags gets stuck in a pulley]
Son of a bitch. Wouldn't you know it? Last one?
Stay cool, man. We'll get it. Easy does it now.
[As they try to get the back through, one of the suction cups on the ceiling comes loose]
Damn piece of crap.
[The suction cup unsticks, but Lupin and Jigen pull on the rope before the bag hits the floor. They sigh with relief]
[fearing the worst about Lupin] Good heavens, what have I done?
[previewing the next episode] Next time I fall in love with Jackie O. Or maybe not. I don't know. My head hurts. It kind of looks like her and sure looks like love. Walking in the rain, putting on a little show for perverts with binoculars. Oh, he's not? He's trying to kill me? Actually, you know, that kind of adds a touch of kink. Anyway, catch you later in Snake Charmer.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Lupin III pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.