Anthony Cooper quotes from Lost

Anthony Cooper

I'm a con man, not a murderer.

John Locke

[about Emily Locke] She said that I didn't have a father -- that I was immaculately conceived.

Anthony Cooper

[laughing] Really? Well, I guess that makes me god, huh?

Anthony Cooper

I killed myself off because there are two men out there who were going to beat me to it.

Locke

Oh, what did you do, steal their livers?

Ben

[Hands Locke a knife] I know it won't be easy. But the quicker the better.

Cooper

[After Ben ungags him] You're kidding me, right? You expect him to kill me?

Ben

John, the hesitation you're feeling is just the part of you that still feels that he has a perfectly good explanation for stealing your kidney. Throwing you out of an eight-story window. Don't you wanna be free from him?

Cooper

The hesitation he's feeling is because he is a spineless--

Locke

[Growing anxious] Shut up! I, I've gotta think...

Ben

Don't think, John.

Cooper

You're wasting your time, bug-eye. Me and him have been through all of this. All he wants is his daddy.

Locke

Shut up! I SAID SHUT UP!

Ben

Let go of him, John.

Locke

Why are you doing this to me?

Ben

You're doing this to yourself. As long as he's still breathing, you will still be that same sad, pathetic little man who was kicked off of his walkabout tour because you couldn't walk!

Cooper

[Mocking] I'll be here the rest of the week, John, if you change your mind.

Ben

I'm sorry. He's not who we thought he was.

Cooper

Guess I didn't raise no dummies.

Sawyer

The hell's that mean?

Cooper

It means that bald headed bastard outside the door is my son.

Sawyer

Come again?

Cooper

My son. As in I'm his father. You do speak English?

Sawyer

How did you get here, to the Island?

Cooper

Island? OK. I'm driving down I10 through Tallahassee when bam, somebody slams into the back of my car. I go right into the divider at seventy miles an hour, the next thing I know, the paramedics are strapping me to a gurney, stuffing me into the back of an ambulance and one of them actually smiles at me as he pops the IV in my arm. And then, nothing. Just, black. And the next thing I know I wake up in a dark room tied up, gag in my mouth, and when the door opens, I'm looking up at the same man I threw out a window, John Locke. My dead son.

Sawyer

And he's dead cause you threw him out a window?

Cooper

No he survived that. But it paralysed him, permanently. He's dead because the plane he was flying on crashed in the Pacific.

Sawyer

Well I got bad news for ya pops, cause I was on that plane with your son. He sure as hell wasn't crippled. And we didn't crash in the Pacific, we crashed here on this Island.

Cooper

You sure its an Island?

Sawyer

Well what else is it?

Cooper

Little hot for heaven isn't it?

Sawyer

[Sarcastically] Oh OK, so we're dead?

Cooper

They found your plane on the bottom of the ocean. One minute I'm in a car wreck and the next minute I'm in a pirate ship in the middle of the jungle. If this isn't hell friend, then where are we?

Sawyer

Why did you throw Locke out a window?

Cooper

He was becoming a nuisance. I conned him into giving me one of his kidneys. He never got over it.

Sawyer

[Pauses] Conned?

Cooper

Yes sir, conned.

Sawyer

What's your name?

Cooper

Hmm?

Sawyer

Your name.

Cooper

A conman goes by many names friend. I've been Alan Seward, Anthony Cooper, Ted MacLaren, Tom Sawyer, Louis Jackson, and Paul...

Sawyer

Tom Sawyer.

Cooper

I was young and Huck Finn was taken. And the ladies loved that one. Made me charming.

Sawyer

Well how about that.

Cooper

How about what?

Sawyer

Sawyer's my name too

Cooper

What's the matter with you?

Sawyer

You ever been to Jasper, Alabama?

Cooper

Why?

Sawyer

Have you or haven't you?

Cooper

Yeah I been to Jasper. Don't tell me I'm your daddy?

Sawyer

No. You killed my daddy.

Sawyer

Read it.

Cooper

“Dear Mr Sawyer”. What is this?

Sawyer

Just read it.

Cooper

“You don't know who I am, but I know who you are. And I know what you done. You had sex with my mother, and then you stole my dad's money all away, so he got angry and he killed my mother, and then he killed himself” blah blah blah blah. So what? Is this supposed to be you, you wrote this letter? Hey wait a second. Did you take my name because you were on some kind of revenge kick?

Sawyer

Keep reading.

Cooper

Easy, easy, don't get all worked up. Look, I ran that con two dozen times. If your mother was one of the...

Sawyer

Mary. Her name was Mary.

Cooper

Mary from Jasper, Alabama. Yeah, I remember her. She practically begged me to take her thirty-eight thousand dollars and to rescue her from her sorry little life.

Sawyer

You finish the letter.

Cooper

Look, I only took her money. It ain't my fault your dad overreacted. If he pulled the old murder suicide then I'm sure he's down here somewhere. Er, maybe you could take this up with him...

Sawyer

FINISH IT!!!

Cooper

OK. OK.