Law & Order: Special Victims Unit quotes

Benson

Seventeen years as a corrections officer. Eleven different prisons. It says here that the first ten stops were maximum security men's facilities.

I go where I'm told.

Benson

You go where you're not gonna get your ass kicked.

[pauses] What are you talking about?

Benson

I read your evaluations. They dumped you at Sealview because you didn't have the balls to handle men.

Shut up.

Benson

You know what I think? I think you hate women. That's why you rape them. And if you hate women so much, that must mean that you like men.

Shut up. Shut up, you filthy whore. Do you understand me?

Benson

Did I strike a nerve?

Benson

He almost killed me.

Hunter

He didn't know you were a cop.

Benson

And that gives him the right to attack me?

Hunter

The law gives Officer Harris every right to strike an inmate to force compliance!

Benson

But not the right to try and rape me!!

Dr. Warner

How'd you know to ask Ashley about the mole?

Benson

[evasive] She remembered.

Dr. Warner

But you couldn't have known she was right.

Benson

[pause] I saw it... when he had me in the basement.

Dr. Warner

Olivia, did he rape you?

Benson

[quietly] It's the closest I've ever come.

Stabler

Where were you last night?

Hanging with friends.

Stabler

Doing what?

Stuff.

Stabler

Where?

Around.

Stabler

Okay, hey -- I want you to start answering my questions in complete sentences.

My client doesn't know what happened that night, he's confused.

Novak

What, he confused committing murder with a little slap and tickle?

[after his brain damage has forced him to retire from football] I had it all. Career, someone I loved ... football gave me everything. Then took it all away.

Munch

"Just following orders." That's the preferred defense of every war criminal from Eichmann to Milosevic.

I put my faith in a little god in a white coat and he killed my wife and son. PUSH THE BUTTON!

Stabler

No.

PUSH … THE … BUTTON!!!

Stabler

I can't do it.

No? Why?

Stabler

Too many people have suffered already.

Then you, Elliot Stabler, are a human being. Congratulations, you are not a sheep like I was. You're a man. Thank you.

Where are you taking me?

Benson

Central Booking.

May I tie my shoe?

Stabler

Yeah, sure. Go ahead.

Thank you.

Great body.

Benson

Excuse me?

The coffee. Though I`ll bet yours is smooth and robust.

I didn't bribe anyone.

Novak

[sarcastically] No. That $50,000 payment to juror #4 was charity.

Novak

What are you selling, Brett?

Criminal Defense.

Novak

Yeah, hard to imagine.

You've worked sex crimes longer than most and you're still passionate, we need you.

Novak

Yeah, well, it's harder to care when your clients are guilty.

Ours are accused of SEC violations, not diddling some 4-year-old on the playground.

Novak

Look, I'm sorry. I have to go.

No more late night calls, no more rape victims and dead kids. How do you sleep at night?

Novak

I don't.

Novak

You wanted to see me, Judge Donnelly?

Yes. The DA is declining to re-file charges against Thomas Crane.

Novak

He raped and murdered Alisa Hernandez, and he gets to keep his badge?

Because of your actions, counselor.

Novak

With all due respect, ma'am, this doesn't concern you.

It does now. [hands Novak a notice]

Novak

I'm being called before the bar.

At my insistence.

Novak

Why?

Because you lost perspective. And because I sit on the peer review board, and I cannot allow you to commit a Brady violation and lie to the court without consequence.

Novak

The reports weren't finished, your honor! I sent them back!

You lied to Petrovsky, and now, you are lying to me. The lab reports were dated and stamped! We are civil servants, Casey! No one is falling on their sword for you. What I want to know is why.

Novak

Because the bad guys can't always win. He deserved to pay.

And so do you.

Novak

How much trouble am I in?

Censure. Possible suspension.

Novak

For how long?

A year. Maybe more.

Novak

What should I do?

Something else.

Fin, grab Elliot and go check out the Lydia. [Fin does not leave] There a problem?

Fin

You know my beef with Stabler. He's a total head case. I'd rather have any other partner.

It's not ladies' choice today, detective. Suck it up. Do your job.

Fin

You got my request for transfer 3 months ago. Any idea what's holdin' that up?

Nope.

Fin

You signed off on the 5-7?

And gave you a glowing recommendation. If you like, I'll call the Chief of D's office, see where it's at.

Fin

That's great. Thanks.

No problem. In the meantime, you've got an assignment.

Munch

Ah, the smell of stale beer and quiet desperation. Did I ever tell you about the bar I owned in Baltimore?

Fin

'Bout a kazillion times.

Munch

I'd like to open one up here, but the real estate's a bit pricier.