[After finding another petite corpse]
Big day for little women.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
You know, I have a theory about why certain men are attracted to petite women. You wanna hear it?
TTalbott
Not particularly.
Petite women are a snug fit for small men.
TTalbott
That's so ridiculous.
No. I think I'm onto something here. Small men can feel like they have a titan missile in their pocket. You're a small guy. What size shoe do you wear?
[Goren thumps his foot onto the table.]
I wear a 13. you look like a 9 or ... you know, like an 8?
TTalbott
I'm an ... oh, God, I don't even want to talk to you about this. Don't drag me into this.
[Talbott fends Goren off. Goren laughs with delight.]
You got small hands, too! That's the giveaway, isn't it? It's always the little things. [laughs] Oops!
[Looking at a victim's international driver's license picture]
The maid said he was good looking. This makes him look like all three of the Three Stooges.
[On hearing that a customer who ordered a suit has been killed.]
TTailor
This is a disaster. The pattern's been made, the cloth's been cut.
[Going through victim's rolodex] Here's George W.'s address in Texas.
[Going through victim's papers] Really? I have a letter from Donald Trump thanking Dupont for his "timely advice." And he misspells the word "investment."
You'd think Trump's secretary would use spell-check.
[Upon finding forgeries of character references in the victim's assistant's apartment]
Why would an heir to the Dupont fortune need phony character references?
Low self-esteem?
If a guy was picking my wallet and my bed, I'd want him whacked, too.
[Eames and Goren review the record of a con.]
Conviction for assault, assault, assault...
A collector.
Charge them for a murder they didn't commit of a person who isn't dead? I can't begin to count the number of violations that would entail.
Mr. Carver. This man Dupont, or whatever his name is, has had us chasing our tails for a couple of weeks now. I don't know about you, but I do not like being made a fool of.
[Carver looks like he's wavering. Goren looks encouraging.]
Payback is the healthy human response here.
10 to one he'll call me back. He has something to prove to me one.
10 to one?
I've taken him on before, Mr. Carver. I'm down 18 bucks.
Don't tell me you feel sorry for this guy.
Someone to teach you how to ride a bike, two people that think you're special, makes a difference.
Some people get by on a lot less.
They shouldn't have to.
For once, I was really hoping you were wrong.
Here it comes, Necedrol headache number 14.
The FDA analyzed the cyanide. it's all from the same batch, but they're still trying to get a line on where it came from.
I put out the word to my own sources.
What sources?
Watchdog groups who keep track of shipments of dangerous chemicals.
Tree-huggers.
What about the great American pastime?
Which one? Dieting or cheating on your taxes?
Suing.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Law & Order: Criminal Intent pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.