Mr. Ping and Tigress in “Crane on a Wire”

[standing on a pedestal] Hello! And welcome to the Jade Palace Master Kung Fu Charity Auction! And brought to you by Ping's Noodle Shop. This week only, all noodle soup profits go directly to the new children's hospital. [a group of kids cheer] But not dessert profits. [the kids groan sadly] What? Let's not go cuckoo crazy here. Hmm… okay… dessert profits too. [the kids cheer again] Okay, okay, let's get right to the bidding! First up, Master Tigress!

[to Po; smugly] Watch and learn, charitable chump.