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S4 E5

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia · Season 4, Episode 5

Frank, Dennis and others in “Mac & Charlie Die (Part 1)”

I can't believe they're dead.

I can't believe they didn't include me in their suicide pact.

What, are you crazy? They're not dead! They're definitely doing something stupid, but they're not dead.

You saw the tape, Dee! My best friends went out in a blaze of glory, and they didn't even ask me to be part of it! This is terrible!

Are you buying this? That is ridiculous. Dennis, they left us a list of demands!

What are you talking about? That's their last will and testament, that is not demands!

It says at the top, "list of demands"!

Well, whatever. It's their wishes, and we have to honor them.

Oh, we do? We have to honor them? Okay, let's see, Frank. Charlie's number one: "My ashes are to be made into a tea and to be drinken by every-wan in bar."

Done!

Ugh. Damn it. Gross. Fine, what else?

Mac's number one: "In lieu of a body - which was most likely blown up in the most awesome way imaginable - I would like the duster to be burned, and its ashes buried in an unmarked grave somewhere by the river."

Okay, well, that's crazy. I'm not gonna burn or bury the duster.

Oh yeah, we also both have to name our firstborn child Murphy, because that was RoboCop's name.

Goddamn it! Mac is dead, and he's still bossing me around!

Mac is not dead, Dennis.

How can you be so cold?

HE BLEW UP MY CAR!

Not burning the duster...

YOU'RE STILL TALKING ABOUT A COAT?!

ABSOLUTELY!

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