Danny quotes from Hustle

Danny

I’m not a payer for sexer.

Danny

I bet I’ve got a bigger willy than you.

Danny

This is nuts.

Danny

Never trust Australians. I'm telling you, they're all descended from crooks.

Danny

Oh yes. We're on.

We are so far from the jackpot.

Danny

Hey! Any time you want to give me some encouragement, feel free. Okay?

This is not a club! You're not earning a Scouting badge for Grifting Grade Four! We have a lot of hoops to jump through, not least of which is a painting we haven't seen yet, painted by someone we can't trust an inch, and we are also currently art thieves!

Danny

Cool.

It is not "cool," Danny! We're grifters. We mine peoples greed!

Will you be lunching with us Mr. Winston?

No thank you Paul. My colleague and I have some business to discuss

The library is free

Lovely

Danny

How do you remember all your names?

No need to. A place like this, it's their job to remember.

Danny

You gotta get us a decent place, Ash.

Ash

I'm workin' on it.

Danny

[Frustrated] Can you work on it quicker, please?

Ash

Yeah, we've been through every major hotel in London. The couple we could've used you nosed up with dodgy credit cards.

Danny

Not being funny, mate, okay. We need a new gaff 'cause I can smell cats.

Ash

Look, I told you, I'm workin' on it, all right?

Danny

All right, how about I share a room with Stacie, then, make things a bit more bearable.

Stacie

Eew, for who?

Danny

Can I ask you something?

No.

Danny

Only, unless I'm missing something, you don't seem to get much in the way of female company.

I do all right.

Danny

When?

When I'm as far away from you as possible.

Danny

You see, I get loads.

[Laughs] Yeah, well, you get loads because you're not as choosy as I am.

Danny

Hey mate, it's all the same when the lights are out.

You really believe that, don't you?

Danny

All right, all right. What do you look for in a bird, then?

Wit, elegance, femininity...

Danny

Me too. And if they've got a humongous pair of jugs, bingo!

So Henderson issued a challenge.

Which was?

The truest test of a grifter's skill. They were both dropped off in the middle of New York at noon... naked.

[Stunned] What?

Stacie

Naked?

...As the day they were born. Henderson and Devlan agreed to meet that very evening at six pm to compare spoils and see who had accumulated the most.

Danny

That's brilliant. That's brilliant! Let's do it!

[Trails off from laughing] Oh God, he's serious.

You can't lead your own crew.

Danny

Why not?

Because you're immature, irresponsible, reckless, empty-headed and impulsive.

Danny

[Cheerfully] But apart from all that! I'm ready!

Ash

No, no, no. When you land you need to bend your knees, Danny. All right? And if you're coming in fast, you bend and you roll.

So, Ash, are we ready?

Danny

Whoa! Whoa, whoa! All we've done is jump off a box twice!

[Deadpan] Would you like to do it again?

Danny

You said I'd have proper training!

Danny, how hard can it be? You jump and then you land! We've covered it.

Danny

Well, what if the reserve don't open?

Ash

All right, okay, look, if the reserve doesn't open there's a standard procedure, all right?

Danny

Tell me that!

Ash

All right, now, you grab the knees of your jumpsuit and you lean forward. Go on.

Danny

Like that?

Ash

Further. [Danny bends over more] That's it, good. Yeah. Stick your head between your legs.

Stacie

And you kiss your ass goodbye.

So, how many jumps have you done?

A few.

What about you, Danny?

Danny

[Clearly terrified] Oh, God!!!

[Smiles awkwardly] He's quite new.

Danny

[Nearly hysterical] Okay, okay, I resign!! I don't want to be a grifter anymore! I want to be a postman!

[Going to the plane door] Okay!

Think about Albert!

Danny

[Moves to go with Mickey] I hate you!!!

[Jokingly] I hate you too! Come on!